Exodus' Sanctuary

I'm Home!

2010-05-19T17:23:00.001+08:00

Sleep deprived and exhausted, I guess I really am glad. So my last post did not come true, yay!

I'm I really that glad?

2010-05-16T08:15:00.002+08:00

So finals are over and I am finally coming going home to Malaysia in about, lets see... 79 hours. I was very excited over the last few days, but perhaps I started thinking too much and remembering the less happy things about home. I started questioning if I am perhaps being over optimistic that going home would be so wonderful.

Perhaps it wouldn't be as wonderful as I imagined, perhaps I might get reverse culture shock. Perhaps I'll feel bored after the first week. These thoughts are depressing at times, but I guess I need to be realistic and be aware that going home may not be the best thing in the world.

They say that once I go back, it'll get tough when friends and family start losing interest in your experiences abroad, and once things settle down the good things abroad and the bad things at home will stand out very distinctively.

But as I think of all the close friends and family back home, how can it be that bad. So what if it's hot and less safe and filled with mosquitoes? I've grown up there, and though it may take a while to readjust, that's the one true place I will call home.

I guess only time will tell if going back turns out to be so wonderful, awful, or somewhere in between...

ETA

2010-05-06T14:10:00.001+08:00

313 hours

...

to my front gate...

Recollections...

2010-04-29T22:49:00.006+08:00

18 days left before I fly back to Malaysia, or perhaps I ought to look at what I have accomplished thus far?

Within arriving here on August 18th 2009, it has been little more than 8 months, but I have:

-Passed the first two actuarial examinations
-Scored a 4.0 in my first semester (hopefully I can maintain that for my current semester)
-Taken saxophone lessons and improved/get exposed to more music
-Learnt a great deal about what working as an actuary would be like, including a job shadow to Principal Financial Group
-Spent roughly $40,000 in total
-Gone to Chicago for 3 days and tasted awesome Chinatown food
-Gotten to know an awesome host family (the Wrights)
-Fell ill about twice, mostly from the awful weather fluctuations
-Made a snowman, a snow angel, and went sledding with said host family
-Performed in Concert Band
-Managed the pulling of curtains for International Night
-Performed a Solo with a great piano accompanist for Malaysian Night (including Take Five)
-Played lots of basketball and badminton
-Bought a LOT of stuff, mainly books, and mostly through Amazon
-Bought an AWESOME laptop =)
-Played lots of games on my laptop (both alone and with friends)
-Played around with Photoshop Elements 8 for a bit
-Eaten an awful lot of wraps, pizza, and ice-cream
-Been evacuated from my dorm no less than 3 times due to fire alarms, only once appeared to be a serious pipe leakage that flooded someone's room
-Not managed to cook much, but have been able to observe friends cooking
-Worked in the weight room (gym) at the recreation center to make sure people abide by the rules and don't kill themselves working out
-Gotten to meet a lot of great friends, lots of Malaysians, but some americans and international students too
-Learned to like my alarm clock more...
-Watched 5 seasons for Friends and almost through 3 seasons of the Big Bang Theory
-Attended more than 10 free recitals given on campus, including some amazing faculty performances for Saxophone, Clarinet, as well Drake's own wind symphony, saxophone quartets, and Jazz Ensembles
-Learnt a great deal of astronomy, and went to see the observatory on a field trip
-Taken a lot of photos, especially of squirrels
-Had a crush on someone?
-Went house/apartment hunting for the coming semester
-Blogged quite a bit this semester
-Spent a lot of time on Facebook
-Skyped with my family at least 10 times
-Helped to sort garbage into recyclable categories during Drake Relays
-Visited Mall of America and two outlet malls
-Half completed a compositional work for piano
-Witnessed lots of drama and political backstabbing/gossiping among Malaysians here in Drake
-Watched a live football game and several live basketball games on campus
-Caught a free t-shirt chucked into the crowd in one of the basketball games
-Developed a better attitude for handling less admirable professors

Now that I look back at that list, I feel easy that my time in the US was not as wasteful as I thought it might be.

For those of you wondering how it has been in the US for me, I would probably answer "It's been great!" But I guess the above list would give a much better picture...

Remember...

2010-04-25T17:00:00.001+08:00

They say we should remember relationships for their uniqueness,
and not compare one to the other.
But I cannot help but compare.
The similarities are too striking.
The more I reflect on it,
The more familiar it looks.

There comes a stage where there is an attraction,
And then I ask:
How much do I know?
And I realize how little I do,
And so I thirst for more knowledge,
To better understand.

And whilst there are many things I do not know,
My imaginative mind paints these wonderful pictures,
Of the wonderful possibilities.
But my imagination is not realistic,
It borders on perfectionism and high expectations.

Then comes the time when I start to find out,
That what I had imagined and dreamt,
Is not what is really there.
I feel disappointed,
I feel discouraged.
Was it all just a faint illusion,
Why does it never seem to work out?

Then comes the stage,
Where I finally come to terms,
And accept that what I see is what there is.
And there comes the point where people say:
Flaws are not the deal breakers,
But the ability to overlook them,
To treasure and love one in spite of them,
That makes it all so special.

The transition of emotions I have experience in the past few days,
Difficult as it may have felt then,
Appear much clearer and comfortable to me now.
The painful hours of doubt,
Of fear,
Of uncertainty,
That is what makes it all so worth it in the end.
The important things in the end,
Is not the “Result”
But rather the experience,
And the memories that I can take forth with me.
There is nothing to regret,
But to regret not trying…

Something in my head...

2010-04-22T15:48:00.001+08:00

Having a hard time sleeping, I decided to rant out all that was on my mind into Microsoft Word. After I was done, I realized I ought to post it here anyway:

"The question is still burning in my mind. So many reasons to, because life rewards action, because intuitively that is what I want, because I should not wait forever. Why do I still not take action? Perhaps it is a fear of failure, the illusion of a possibility of success alone seems more satisfying than taking the risk and actually succeeding or failing. But should it not be failure that teaches us how to succeed in the future? Should it not be that because I fear failure, that I “should” do it?
Two worlds apart, a huge gap in upbringing, in culture, in history, and religion, but joined on the narrow bridges of education, passion for music, and a positive outlook on life. Are the obstacles the reason that it would fail, or the reason that it would succeed?

Even if I decided that I would go for it, how would I start? This is a field where many so called experts give advice but in the end it is always on a case-by-case basis? How do you prepare for a field where it is the unique individuality and spontaneity that enriches the experience, where there is no such thing as the right and correct technique, where there is no definitive answer and solution?
Four years ago, I had a similar situation, I was bolder than, perhaps more naïve, but willing to take risk. I took action, though I am not sure if I did it the right way, nevertheless I tried my best. I look back, and I smile at what happened, despite not ending where I had hoped, I realized that I had not lost anything, but perhaps gained a very special friend, who otherwise might have just been another stranger to me today.

Why am I so scared of risk today? My major revolves around managing risk, by distributing its financial consequences. But what I am afraid to do, cannot be resolved with money. What I might miss, could never be priced, and could never be exchanged for. Such is the uniqueness of relationships; it is something intangible and incomparable.

I have already written myself into a corner, there is no reason for me left; no excuses to delay. What am I waiting for? Go after her!"

Reasons to Blog...

2010-04-15T22:50:00.002+08:00

*Phew* I just got over 2 quizzes and 4 tests this week, and am feeling AWESOME (and lacking sleep) but anyway, here are some reasons all of you reading this should go back to BLOGGING =)

-Because you can talk anytime you want and your audience can read it anytime THEY want

-Because you won't get interrupted of have someone bring you off topic

-Because people want to know what you think, and for some people, typing it out seems easier

-Because it's good practice for your english (or whatever language you blog in)

-Because I want you to :D

-Because it's a medium of self expression

-Because many years from now, you will read back all your thoughts and trust me it will feel AMAZING

-Because blogging is so much more > than facebook status updates

-Because you can be more selective of who reads your posts

-Because there is so much to blog about: yourself, your family, your friends, something you love, something you hate, something funny you just made up, something that is worth sharing with others, updates to your friends on how you're doing, to rant about something, to upload photos, to upload videos, to give links you've found to really cool sites/youtube, to create stories, to mess up other people's stories (parodies), to talk about intellectual stuff, to scream about your sports team dissapointing you etc. (the list is almost never ending)

So go back to your blog and write something! (and drop me a message here so I know you're updating again) =)

How to abuse Einstein's Theory of Relativity

2010-04-10T03:03:00.002+08:00

In case you haven't noticed, a lot of these crazy physics and astronomical posts stemmed from what I have learnt in my Astronomy class.

Ever heard of people complaining (like on facebook) that 24 hours a day isn't enough, that they need more hours to finish work/sleep? Here's a "practical" solution...

According to Einstein's theory of relativity, when approaching a very strong gravitational force or approaching the speed of light, time itself will become dilated. Basically, from an outsider's point of view (e.g. people on earth), those approaching the speed of light or a very strong gravitational force will experience time dilation, where they will age slower. Time appears relatively slower in such conditions. From the perspective of someone who is under such conditions however, time does not feel to slow down, but the world around seems to be speeding up, and long distances appear to shrink.

So if we were given the ability and resources, we can manipulate time in such a way to our advantage.

For example, if find a way to make everyone else on the earth travel at near the speed of light but not ourselves, or make everyone on earth experience a VERY strong gravitational force but not yourself, then they would age slower while we age faster. This means that one hour for them would be like 2 hours for us (or 5 hours, or 20 hours, or a year, this depends on how close you get them to the speed of light, the closer they are, the more time dilates). So you can finish all your work, catch your sleep, take some time off and appear to be able to accomplish so much more in such a short time, at least to them. There is catch though: you will age a lot faster the more you do this, and might die much earlier than most of your friends...

But how on earth do we get everyone else except us near a strong gravitational force or near the speed of light? Or perhaps we can do it the other way round?

If you are complaining that time goes by too slowly, and you want to find some way to kill a few hours, (or days or weeks or even years) we do the opposite: Make ourselves go near the speed of light. Because we age slower but do not feel like time slows down, the world around us will speed up. So we travel at near the speed of light, or find some way to travel near the earth's core and still come back alive, then our 1 day would be 5-10 days for them (again depending how close you get to the earth's core or the speed of light). It might be easier to affect ourseves alone with this conditions, but a problem here is that other people around you will age faster, which means that if you do this extensively, people around you are going to appear to die much younger.

So, those of you complaining about having too much time or too little time, I have just given you a way to solve your problem, all you need to do is find a way to get just yourself, or the entire earth except you, to go near the speed of light, or near a very strong massive object to experience a very strong gravitational force.

Or perhaps a much easier solution would be just to manage yourself to fit 24 hours a day better...

Busy Times...

2010-03-30T22:49:00.002+08:00

Ah, the dread of having things to blog but no time to do it when inspiration strikes, I have a rather right schedule for the coming three weeks, and will be unlikely to update until then.

Meanwhile, I shall draw your attention to this to entertain you (nerd alert) =)

Take care and stop using plastic bags :D

Back from spring break

2010-03-23T11:31:00.002+08:00

So after a week of holidays, I am back from spring break to resume my work.

...wait a minute, why do we say "back"? we're not going back to the past, and time moves linearly, not in circles.

I started seeing signs that the two sides of spring break may not necessarily be the same. And why should it? This assumption is what made some people depressed that holidays are ending. I choose to see that this side of spring break would be a better one, since I honestly think I did a lousy job in the other one, for reasons ranted in the previous post.

The weather has changed, my clock is one hour ahead ahead, now officially 13 hours behind Malaysian time.

I see people playing ultimate, football, and just pitching to each other in the sun while I eat my dinner in the dining hall. It actually feels pleasant, to see the university come alive again, seeing cheerful people out in the open, it just made me drop my negative thoughts in my head and wonder why I still hide in my room so much, lamenting about stress and all the minute problems.

I need to remember that this is spring, not winter, and the winter mentality of bundling myself under blankets and hiding should be dropped too. What I need is probably a breathe of fresh air, and to look at my problems from a different point of view. After all that is what I usually do when I am stuck in a problem. It works out so much easier when I stop looking at it and take a break, and when I look at the problem again, it becomes different, and at times simpler.

Having a hard time managing my timetable? Take a break, breathe, and look at it again.

Struggling for an upcoming actuarial paper that I am worried about? Take a break, breathe and look at it again.

We often overlook the importance of looking at our problems from a fresh perspective. After all, problems come in many forms, and it would be foolish to think that one perspective can solve all of them.

Well, it's time for me to take a break and breathe, perhaps you could try it if you have something in the back of your mind nagging at you?

P.S. Feel free to share whether using a fresh perspective works for you in my cbox over on the right ;p

Wasted Time...

2010-03-22T06:14:00.002+08:00

It suddenly hit me yesterday night that perhaps I ought to reevaluate how I spend my time more carefully. This is probably due to a few factors: Stress from facing exam P in two weeks while I still do not feel prepared, observation that others appear to have a better grasp of the subejct than I do (you can't trust what they say these day, it's too common for malaysians to speak lowly of themselves, and even more foolish to take comfort when someone else says "yeah, I'm gonna die in this exam too"), having spent enormous amounts of time playing games this past break that I appear to have finally accomplished the goal of assuaging my need to enjoy and relax, and that fact that I scored rather badly in a past STAT 132 exam.

I had to really own up to the fact that I had been using his bad teaching as an excuse not to work hard in that subject. I may not have accepted or admitted the fact, but I had become reactive, blaming the professor for my lack of enthusiasm in this field. I gave myself many excuses: "His teaching is so unstructured, his explanations are not clear, I don't like his lack of professionality in class, other students complain about him too, he makes mistakes rather often on the board, and I let this bad image of him block out any attempt he made to actually teach whatever he can. I blamed the textbook too when I was taking STAT 131 under the class, saying to myself that the explanations were so complicated, and at one point I was thinking that the book might actually be even worse than the professor.

It hit me a few days ago that this is the situation I am faced, and I cannot change this. If I want to succeed in a field such as actuarial science, what I need is not to pass all the papers and get a high CGPA, what I need is not to get into the company that everybody wants to join. No, what I need is to understand.

I need to understand what I am doing, I need to understand why I am doing what I am doing, and I need to be convinced that what I do matters, and will benefit others in the end. Perhaps I should not have expected a smooth ride, as the obstacles that I have faced have become distractions from my goal, and up till now, I have chose to be distracted, rather than focus on the main purpose that I have come here to study.

I believe that we are nothing more than the sum of our decisions, of what we decided to invest our time in. It is hard to think of the future in such a way, when distractions are so colorful and attractive these days, but when we look back at what we have done in the past, that is what we are today. If I had spent more of my free time grinding and crunching that horrible textbook to understand what it was really talking about, I might have a much better grasp of what I am learning in class, and a much better general idea of what I am trying to learn.

I started with a misconception that to succeed in actuarial science, you only needed to be good in maths, and be able to translate that into english to other people you work for. What I have learnt since, is that maths is a very broad field, and the specific aspects of mathematics that an actuary needs to calculate and manage risk, involved the following:

the knowledge of finance, because we are mostly trying to manage financial risk, and this involves knowing the gist of how the financial world works

the knowledge of probability, which involves abstract mathematical concepts to quantify uncertainty.

the knowledge of statistics, which is the tool that helps us qunatify uncertainty in the real world, by using data to predict the future

the knowledge of business, to apply the concepts of probability and statistics into a practical business product/solution

the knowledge of information technology, an essential part of applying statistics and probability to understand and quantify risk

and most importantly, the knowledge of persistence, because all the above is not simple to understand, and parts of it (such as probability and statistics) takes a lot of effort to understand.

I could continue blaming my circumstances for why I am not following my statistics class well, just like how I have accepted my circimstances as a give for most of my life, but perhaps it is time for me to look at it more proactively and focus on my goal.

I once read that a key criteria of becoming successful, is to be willing to do what normal people are not willing to do. It is time to stop looking at my peers if that would distract me, and strive to work harder on what I have neglected in the past.
My ex-tutor once said a very important quote: "The road to success is a lonely one" This strikes me intuitively as true, and yet I am puzzled by how so many people assume that we can succeed, and still have a great time in the process. I only hope there is still enough time...

The Fringe Benefits of Failure...

2010-03-18T07:25:00.003+08:00

I found a very good link from my friend:

Click Here

It's worth watching all the way to the end, and it really works to help us understand J.K.Rowling as more than just the author of Harry Potter.

But more than that, she outlines a very important lesson that many of us do not realize, the importance of having failed.

We live in a world where failure is seen as a pure negative, where we always want to succeed, and to some of us, not succeeding is already seen as a failure.

I will let J.K.Rowling herself speak of the benefits of failing, but another thing I pointed out is that this trend is very western. Dating back to the renaissance period, we see the oustanding individual accomplishments as something to strive for, to admire. On the other hand, a chinese cultural heritage has taught me valuable lessons to remember for life. One saying proposes that (in literal translation) "failure is the mother of success" and this already contains some truth to what J.K.Rowling tries to elaborate.

Failure, like success, is not a destination. It is a process, a very important process where we, in this superficial world that is so heavily influenced by the media, can finally look at the mirror and see what we are really made of. What lies beneath all those layers of image, identity, reputation, and opinions? What do we have left that remains truly our inner traits and characteristics when we discard all the irrelevant and unnecessary components?

This rediscovering of our inner self was what J.K.Rowling attributes her current situation to. When we have finally seen our real bare exposed self, we see what we can really achieve. When we stop making the unreachable our references, and look for our source of strength from within, not from the outside, that is where we can achieve our highest potential.

Let's do a mental exercise: Imagine, five years from now (or 10 if you like), that you have reached a dead end. Every hope or dream you have set yourself, one way or the other, has not been realized. You appear to have failed despite your very best attenots. You feel discouraged, depressed, that the dream of achieving what you have wanted now looks even further away or unreachable as compared to five years ago.

What is left for you to do? Do you rage and blame the world? Do you blame, luck, fate, destiny, outside forces that you could not control?

But then you remember this strange blogpost that you read five years ago, something about the benefits of failure...

And you start looking inwards, you try and look yourself straight in the eye and ask: "What am I really made of? How do I handle this situation? What do I really want? I have reached the worst point, I no longer fear failure, because I am experiencing it now."

For the first time, you realistically assess your capabilities, your strengths, your weaknesses, your investments over time that you have made to improve yourself in whatever skills you possess.

And you use your failure, as the most solid foundation for your future. Failure used to be a fear, an obstacle, something that held you back, something you wanted to avoid at all costs...

But that was because you did not know failure. You thought of it as your enemy. What happens if you befriended failure? Make failure your teacher, of valuable experiences and knowledge?

The lesson I would remember from this is to change our perspective of failure, because of two cold hard facts:

1) Failure is inevitable
2) Failure makes us stronger, not weaker

So go forth and strive for your goals, but never again let the fear of failure hold you back, because who knows, experiencing failure might be the missing piece for you to succeed.

Attitude is what Life is All About...

2010-03-11T23:43:00.001+08:00

From an email I received from my beloved Aunt today:

1. SOLDIER : SIR WE ARE SURROUNDED FROM ALL SIDES BY ENEMIES ,

MAJOR : EXCELLENT ! WE CAN ATTACK IN ANY DIRECTION.

2. EVERY ONE KNOWS ABOUT ALEXANDER GRAHAM BELL WHO INVENTED THE

TELEPHONE, BUT HE NEVER MADE A CALL TO HIS FAMILY. BECAUSE, HIS

WIFE AND DAUGHTER WERE DEAF. THAT'S LIFE " LIVE FOR OTHERS " .

3. THE WORST IN LIFE IS "ATTACHMENT " IT HURTS WHEN YOU LOSE

IT. THE BEST THING IN LIFE IS " LONELINESS " BECAUSE IT TEACHES

YOU EVERYTHING AND, WHEN YOU LOSE IT, YOU GET EVERYTHING.

4. LIFE IS NOT ABOUT THE PEOPLE WHO ACT TRUE TO YOUR FACE ........

IT'S ABOUT THE PEOPLE WHO REMAIN TRUE BEHIND YOUR BACK .

5. IF AN EGG IS BROKEN BY AN OUTSIDE FORCE..A LIFE ENDS. IF

AN EGG BREAKS FROM WITHIN...... .LIFE BEGINS.

GREAT THINGS ALWAYS BEGIN FROM WITHIN .

6. IT'S BETTER TO LOSE YOUR EGO TO THE ONE YOU LOVE. THAN

TO LOSE THE ONE YOU LOVE ....... BECAUSE OF EGO .

7. A RELATIONSHIP DOESN'T SHINE BY JUST SHAKING HANDS

AT THE BEST OF TIMES. BUT IT BLOSSOMS BY HOLDING FIRMLY

IN CRITICAL SITUATIONS.

8. HEATED GOLD BECOMES ORNAMENTS. BETTED COPPER BECOMES WIRES.

DEPLETED STONE BECOMES STATUE. SO, THE MORE PAIN YOU GET IN

YOUR LIFE THE MORE VALUABLE YOU BECOME.

9. WHEN YOU TRUST SOMEONE TRUST HIM COMPLETELY WITHOUT

ANY DOUBT....... AT THE END YOU WOULD GET ONE OF THE TWO :

EITHER A LESSON FOR YOUR LIFE OR A VERY GOOD PERSON .

10. WHY WE HAVE SO MANY TEMPLES , IF GOD IS EVERYWHERE ?

A WISE MAN SAID :

AIR IS EVERYWHERE, BUT WE STILL NEED A FAN TO FEEL IT .

Feel free to share it with friends =)

The mask...

2010-03-10T03:09:00.002+08:00

No, I'm not talking about the green monstrosity that is Stanley Ipkiss when he puts on his magical mask. No, I am talking about a more subtle mask that I realize so many of us subconsciously put on all the time.

I started to realize not long ago that in a world we live in today where time is so important and limited, we do not have as much leisure as before to get to know our friends and peers on a personal level. A common question that one likes to ask a friend when first getting to know another is "What's your major?" This is such a common question, but many of us follow this up with a mistake, and that is to assume that this person would reflect the personalities we associate with the typical characters of someone pursuing that specialization in life. I have often been thrown this to my face:

"I know you're an actuarial science major, and it is difficult for someone like you to handle situations where there are no clear rights and wrong."

Is this a fair statement to me before even knowing who I am rather than assuming I would be such a person? I know many people who are more certain of things that must be right or wrong than I do, as I often avoid being overly assertive of an opinion, for that blocks out a larger perspective where we could gain so much more by evaluating a different point of angle. I learnt this in philosophy, but I guess most people assume that an actuarial science major would not have such a mentality.

I admit that I myself have many "stereotypes" of people who are in particular fields. I think all business majors are money driven, and ambitious, wanting to live the big dream of being a boss and leaving a legacy behind in the form of a great company.

But how true is that? The next time I meet a new friend and they tell me they have a business degree majoring in finance, it is difficult for me not to automatically assume that this person could have a very different personality from the one I described above.

This leads to a deeper reason that I believe is responsible for a lot of conflicts. Conflict occurs when something that happens does not match your worldview. If a person does something that was completely out of your expectations, it becomes a source of stress and strain on the relationship. One may feel that the other person has "changed" or has been "deceptive' in behavior before this point. What is more probable is that we do not know that person well enough, and made false assumptions rather than spending time to really know what they are like.

How many very close friends do you have that you can confidently say you really know them inside out? How many friends do you have that you really know who they are, rather than the mask they put up?

Spend some time with your friends, not in a group, because that's where people see other masks and try to wear a similar one to fit in. I find it easier to get to know someone deep down when you spend time with them alone, just the two of you, because that is the time where most people drop their masks, and be as honest as they can toward the other person.

Time to look beyond the mask...

The Importance of Punctuality

2010-03-04T02:29:00.004+08:00

I was late for my "The Business Profession (IV)" class today, and as a result, my professor asked me to write a one page paper on "The Importance of Punctuality." After completing it, I realized that I might as well put it up here anyway, so here it is:

Punctuality, which means being on time, is crucial in today’s world where time is ever so valuable. This paper will attempt to elaborate on the importance of punctuality on an individual level, as well as its importance to the surrounding people as well.

From an individual perspective, punctuality is an indication of discipline. If we are punctual, we are willing to control and manage ourselves to show up in a particular place at a particular time. Failing to be punctual may indicate a character whereby following tight schedules or plans is difficult. By developing a habit of being consistently punctual, we give ourselves a few important advantages. Firstly, being on time means not missing part of the event we are attending. Even if the event is deemed to be unimportant, opportunity may strike in the most unusual places, and we all know that the biggest factor behind the most successful individuals is that they took opportunities that others did not have. Secondly, being punctual means arriving as planned. It helps us feel mentally prepared for the task at hand, giving us more time to plan our moves or go about our task more effectively. Arriving late would almost always cause problems or setbacks that may hound us long after the event has passed. Thirdly, consistent punctuality builds a good reputation. In today’s world, a good impression and reputation is indispensable. Opportunities will be given with limited time for consideration, and a reputation for not being punctual will hurt our chances greatly to be given anything of significance which may boost our career.

From a larger perspective, punctuality is important for teams to work together. An effective team would be able to achieve more than just the sum of its parts, but a lack of punctuality by even just one member of the team would greatly offset the effectiveness of the entire team. A meeting for example would be a lot less useful and effective if not all the members are present on time. A lack of punctuality also breeds a lack of trust, as team members doubt the reliability and commitment of other team members because they are not serious enough to make it on time. Showing up late is a non-verbal statement that the person values more important things than the event that he or she showed up late for, and can be very devastating to a team’s morale.

Being punctual may be difficult in a time where we always find 24 hours a day insufficient, when distractions are around us in every direction, and even more so when we are not the only ones showing up late, but we must take into considerations the costs of being late, the negative reputation we portray, the lost opportunities, harmful effects to a team we may be on. Punctuality is highly underrated and underestimated, and we owe it to ourselves and others to be punctual, because we have nothing to lose and everything to gain, just by showing up on time.

Objective and Subjective

2010-02-18T02:02:00.002+08:00

My marketing professor was trying to give an example of the difference between objective and subjective, so she went something like this:

"Now, if I want to buy a hammer, what am I really buying? I'm buying a tool that can make a hole right? Just like when I needed to make a hole to hang the clock at the back of the classroom. But wait, a hammer isn't the only thing that can make that hole I need, I could use for example (she bends down for a while) my shoe."

She held up her right high heeled shoe.

"Do you think this could make a hole?"

The class had a mixed response, some agreeing yes, some thinking maybe not.

Then she proceeded to the wall.

BAM!

She actually made an indent on the wall with her heel!

Half the class went "WHAT? OMG?"

Some elaboration later, she asked.

"Now, do you think I could use either my hammer or my heel to hit a nail in to make a hole. What about this (she pulls out her i-phone). Do you think this can make a hole? Now am saying can I, not would I or should I."

"So objectively, all three can be used to make a hole in the wall with a nail, but subjectively, a hammer would be my preference because I don't wanna spoil my i-phone, or look like a dork banging the nail in with my shoe (oh the irony X.X)."

20 minutes later...

My professor was talking about cognitive dissonance.

"So this is kinda like when we're not sure if we made the right choice after buying something... kinda like how I felt about the hole in the wall now..."

"Now, would you forget the difference between objective and subjective?"

"No" the class murmered.

"Good, that solves my cognitive dissonance."

As I left the class, I looked at the indentation on the wall as I left, wondering if this is really a good way to hammer (parden the pun) a point home in a lecture...

My Cheeky Professor

2010-02-16T05:34:00.002+08:00

So I was in my Life Contigencies class today, and halfway through the lecture, a student raised her hand and asked:

"Sir, could you explain what the 1 above the x means?"

The professor turned around and said,

"Yes..."

and he stood there staring at us, some of us were amused and started laughing, while the rest of us were wondering why he wasn't explaining.

The student tried again:

"Sir could you explain what it means?"

again the professor replied

"Yes..."

after another 5-10 seconds of awkward staring, the professor finally spoke:

"I know what you mean, you just need to rephrase it. You asked me if I could explain, well that's my answer - yes I can explain what the 1 above the x means"

The whole class was laughing... and professor eventnually proceeded to explain what it meant.

5 minutes later...

The professor randomly chose a student and asked him:

"Could you fill up the dx column for me?"

and the student replied:

"Yes..."

Newton's Laws of Motion

2010-02-12T00:36:00.002+08:00

So during astronomy class my professor told us two stories:

The first was about Newton's Second Law of Motion, which basically says F = ma, and through this we can infer that m (mass of an entity) and a (the rate at which it accelerates) is independant of each other, provided that Force is a constant. Thus, if gravity were constant (which for the most part it is, since we are pretty much the same distance from the earth's center) that means a heavier object and a lighter object should fall to the ground at the same rate, regardless of how counter-intuitive it may seem.

So Newton, who discovered this, went to tell Galileo Galilei about it and said:

"Look! It says that different masses will accelerate at the same rate to the ground"

Galileo says "No, you're wrong, of course the heavier object will fall faster"

Newton retorts "No no no, look, on paper, what I said is true!"

Galileo then says "Alright, I will prove you wrong!"

Thus, Galileo took a huge metal ball and a duck, walked to the top of the leaning tower of Pisa, and held both the ball and the duck out the window, and with a large audience watching, dropped both at the same time.

Guess what happened?

The duck flew away...

The second story was about Newton's Third Law of Motion, and in it states that "for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction."

NASA astronauts, wanting to prove their superiority, decided to boast that they are about to walk and work outside the International Space Station, and to prove it, they attempted to have an astronaut do a set of simple tasks on the outer surface of the International Space Station, to prove that if anything goes wrong, they are able to fix it.

It was decided that an astronaut would move to the outside of the station and use a spannar to tighten a bolt. As the astronaut cautiously placed the spannar on the bolt, he tried to turn clock-wise to tighten the bolt.

Guess what happened?

The astronaut spun counter-clockwise up instead...

(since then, they decided to use foothandles to ensure their astronauts don't go spinning around again...)

Reevaluating...

2010-02-05T06:45:00.003+08:00

About 2 years ago, I made up my mind that I would go forth with Actuarial Science and get a degree, which would (hopefully) provide me with financial stability. After all, that appears to be my biggest concern after I graduate.

When I made that decision, (pursuing an Actuarial Science degree) I accounted for the financial cost (about $ 85000 after scholarships), time cost (4 years), energy cost (lots of studying, projects) but, as economists like to say, I forgot the account for the opportunity cost: what I could have been doing instead of actuarial science for these four years.

The most likely option I would have gone for instead of actuarial science then was probably something like computer programming, or maybe a mathematics major. Over the past two years though, I realized that there is an option that I had not considered, something which makes so much more sense to me now then before: music.

I read an interesting book called "Outliers: The Story of Success" by Malcolm Gladwell, and in this book he analyzes what is it that makes the most successful people that successful. Throughout the book in his argument he asserts that success does not solely come from innate ability, talent, or even IQ. The crucial separating factor was that these people love what they do, were given arbitrary and rare but crucial opportunities to develop, and probably spent most of their lives under 20 years old doing it, from Mozart, to Bill Gates, even to sports athletes. He even asserts that there appears to be a magic number of hours that one engages in an activity which would result in mastery to such a level that people will notice and believe that the person in question is unbelievebly talented in that field. Of course, these hours have to be spent with intent and purpose to become better at doing whatever it is, be it computer programming, performing music, or sports.

Any guesses on how many hours it takes?

10,000 hours

That works to about 3 and a half hours everyday 365 days a year for 8 years.

Anyway, I'm not hoping to reach 10000 hours anytime soon in anything, my interests have been too diverse, but I figured that perhaps to make the most of what I can be successful in doing, I should look back at what I have done with most of my time when I was young, and analyze what opportunities gave me. I realized that I am perhaps more fit to have gone on to major in music than in a business program, and Drake's school of music is making me see this more clearly than ever. For one, I could never really let music go, I still take saxophone lessons today, I tried the concert band last semester (which I honestly didn't really enjoy as much as I would have hoped), but enjoy watching recitals and performances a lot, perhaps more than most people I know.

I pretty much spent most of my youth doing 3 things that I enjoyed the most (not including eating and sleeping): Playing/listening/performing/enjoying music, having fun with maths/puzzles/riddles and playing computer games. Reading would come in 4th and badminton 5th, but that is not the point. I realized the more time I spent doing anything, the better I think I am in it (excluding computer games, I personally think I'm not even close to being called a good player, though that's probably because I play games with lifeless people who spend much more time playing than I do.

Nevertheless, it seems a little too late for me to jump to music, though it is possible, it appears too costly and too late. I guess at this point it is too late to switch, for I do not want to go back on my decision and graduate two years later. But I feel the dilemma as my life cycles from going to concerts, then attending marketing classes that bore me, then to listening to music on my laptop with my new Z523 speakers, to maths classes, integrating the density function of poisson distributions (which I do enjoy, but maybe not as much, thanks to a particular professor that I do not really admire), to saxophone lessons, which I do enjoy and appreciate, to my music AOI class which is teaching me music in western culture, in which I learned baroque music again, to a career fair that I was forced to attend in which I try to be competitive in the business world and fight with TONS of malaysian and american actuarial students for internship positions, hoping to land an interview.

It is like living in between two completely different worlds, and my instincts are leaning towards one of them at the moment, and it is not the one I picked two years ago.

Good service

2010-02-02T07:48:00.002+08:00

So I bought a set of Logitech Z-523 speakers, for $80 through Amazon. I tested it when it arrived and realized that there was a problem in the left speaker where certain range of sounds would vibrate in a way as if the speakers have been overplayed, which sounded aweful on certain songs (Clair de Lune for example), piano songs in particular were affected a lot.

So I went to Logitech's support site and told them about it, they asked me for some information, and within 4-5 days managed to get a UPS electronic return label for me so that I would not have to pay anything to send the defective product to Logitech's return center. After getting a friend to help me to the UPS office, I asked their site how long should I expect to wait for the speakers to come back, they told me at most 2 weeks, so I was thinking, alright, at least they'll fix the problem.

That was last Friday, and today (Monday) a set of speakers of the same model, appeared in my inbox. Apparently they sent a new set to me straight away rather than wait to fix the defective one and send it back.

Two weeks? My speakers returned after just one weekend!

I have to praise Logitech and UPS for their excellent service here.

The Unspoken Game...

2010-01-25T09:29:00.002+08:00

There is a game that we all play,
one that we play involuntarily,
subconsciously,
a game that many master,
but many don't,
and some are yet aware of it's existence,
let alone how much it affects us.

It happens anywhere and everywhere,
with a simple condition:
"As long as you are not completely alone,
as long as there is a human being that is within reach of communication",
the game automatically starts,
and it is up to us to make what we want of it.

The game is endless,
with the variety of human life as proof for it's replayability,
and some claim that guidebooks and tips are plentiful,
yet the effects of these "helpful advice" on eveyone is uniquely different and singular,
there is no clear indication of who wins and who loses,
only that you live on with what you create,
whether you want and like it,
or not.

People who excel at this game,
some are naturally talented,
some learn from their mistakes.
Those who thrive in it,
gain respect and charisma,
they gain confidence,
and often find their way more easily than others.

Those who struggle on the other hand,
unknowingly lose opportunities and chances,
they live in fear,
fear of risk,
fear of hurting,
fear of commiting,
but not realizing that they risk to lose more,
for being too careful sometimes leads us to more trouble,
and hiding from this game would not work,
for, back in the beginning I have stated,
it is not in our hands to say we don't want to play.

Learn to play the game,
and we will enjoy a much fuller life,
a richer life,
one filled with good memories;
struggle and ignore the consequences of the game,
and we put outselves in a difficult position,
where people want to help us but can't,
because only our free will can make us play the game well.

What is this game?

The Social Game.

Homesick?

2010-01-23T07:31:00.002+08:00

I fell sick recently, so did my roommate, though his illness started about 6 hourse before mine, we suspect it was something we ate, though I remember from my past experiences that many factors can lead to falling sick, stress is definitely there, because I have a lot to do this semester, including getting a new job, fulfulling class requirements, a professional exam in early April, a saxophone jury (something like a final exam/recital thingy for a panel of judges (my tutor included) and of course, getting enough sleep, which I obviously didn't due to my timetable which has 8am classes twice a week and night classes stretching to 10pm on the nights before.

So here I am 15 hours of sleep later feeling groggy and blur, but I must admit that the sleep felt really good. Though a short chat with a friend of mine reminded me that it's always tougher when we get sick and we're not around our family, indeed, I'm grateful to have my roommates around, who have been very supportive. One of my friends suggested sleeping beside onions in a bowl when sick, maybe I should try that next time.

As of now, I cannot wait for May 16th, the date I'm leaving US for (home sweet home) Malaysia. I should be arriving around the 18th of May and will be there until approximately 15th of August.

Till then, everyone take care and try not to get sick =)

More random stuff...

2010-01-20T06:05:00.002+08:00

-Drake was frosty today, might be because of the mist last night, but all the tree leaves and or tree branches (it's winter remember, no leaves on most) looks like they're covered in frost, which looks really nice, and crystal-like, which somehow reminded me of my Kellogg's Frosted Flakes which I eat every now and then...

-My bed has three pillows, with varying degrees of fluffiness, and when I woke up I was lying stomach down on one and two were on the floor...

-bought Logitech Z523 speakers for $80, will hope they sound nice, waiting for arrival...

-after waking up consistently around 1pm the past week, waking today at 7:40am for class has made me extremely blur and sleepy now, wonder if I can still walk back to my dorm room after dinner...

-Astronomy class looks interesting after my first class, random fact I learned today, you can see the sunrise or moonrise on the earth, but when you're on the moon, you can never see "earthrise" because the moon rotates at such a pace that the face of the moon that faces earth is always the same, therefore you'll either see the earth at a fixed spot from the moon, or not see the earth at all...

-Classes look so interesting at first, just like how I felt at the beginning of last semester, but then the momentum dissapears fast, a mere few weeks after the start of last semester, all classes became degraded into sessions where you're desperately absorbing all "key words" and getting as much insight into the coming exams as possible, the fresh feeling of wanting to learn new things dissapears really fast, I wonder if there's a way to "keep the momentum going"...

-My new roommate Sean showed an interesting device to help us wear our shoes more easily, just slide it in the heel of the show, and it makes a smooth curve for our heels to slide into the shoe, and then pull the device out. I wonder why I've never seen it before...

-Drake squirrels are still so cute...

Back to blogging...

2010-01-19T11:11:00.002+08:00

It's been a long time, but I've finally found some "inspiration" or "urge" or whatever reason it is to restart my blog, but I guess blogging about why I want to start blogging again would be lame and boring, and blogging about everything that happened between the last post and now would be near impossible, so I'll just pretend nothing happened and continue where I left off.

Random stuff in my head:

-Somehow the world of games and sports just love even numbers, but more often than not I seem to be stuck in situations where we have 3 or 5 players...

-Drake's been foggy these days, listening to Debussy's Clair de lune (moonlight) while walking back after some self practice today (still playing saxopone =D) felt really relaxing, until I realized, wait a minute, it's so foggy I can't see any moonlight at all, maybe if Debussy lived here, he might include a movement for foggyness...

-Facebook is evil!!! it takes up so much time...

-Big Bang Theory and Friends ROCK!

-Team Fortress 2 is AWESOME!

-Super Freakonomics: very interesting book

New sem starting soon, got a very small part time job (just one hour a week LOL) which would probably get me $7.25 a week, going for CPR and First aid training this Friday (so I can save people around me, yay).

Busy times ahead, keep in touch.

Arriving at Drake

2009-08-24T06:10:00.003+08:00

After arriving safely at Des Moines, Iowa last on Monday night, I am now settling down in my dorm here on Drake University Campus. I wouuld just say that almost everything I am experiencing here has exceeded my expectations, and I am about to start classes tomorrow.

Des Moines is a realy nice place, today was the first time I felt the Summer sun as the past few days have bee rainy and cloudy. It turned out to be as hot as Malaysia, with the key difference that the air is still cooler, so fining shady places to wait for the bus (strangely enough most of the bus stops have no shelter) does make a big difference.

I probably would not update this site very often, as I believe I would be rather busy. If you would like to know more about my life here, just find me on Messenger, write me an email, or just pm me on facebook. I would love to share my experiences, everyday is full of thins to do over here.

Till then, take care.

My Coffee Shop

2009-07-31T16:48:00.003+08:00

Thanks a lot for keeping my cbox alive, I would like to introduce a project of mine: I'm attempting to start a forum, it's called "My Coffee Place" and serves that exact purpose (minus food and drinks). It's a place for anyone to meet up and discuss or chat about any topic you like, but it's very new and so I would hope that you guys would come and support and make that a lively place. Visit the site, make a bookmark in your browser, register an account (no email verification needed) and start chatting away, and please bring some friends with you to "My Coffee Shop"!

Portal to MY COFFEE SHOP <--Click here!

Thanks in advance for your support!

A Strange Dream...

2009-07-15T14:37:00.003+08:00

I haven't seen you for so long,
haven't thought about you for long as well,
then opportunity strikes again and we're within reaching distance,
but I back away and keep my distance,
doing my own things that I would normally do,
and the perfect chance comes to pass,
I do what I would naturally do,
and was told straight in the face:

"You know, you should really make use of your time..."

I felt awakened after that, but woke up to find that it was a dream.
Funny how dreams like these sound so comical once I wake up, but it sure didn't feel that way.

Should I follow her advice?

Reaching the end of this chapter...

2009-07-06T01:29:00.002+08:00

In case some of you have not been informed, I will be leaving Malaysia to further my studies at Drake University, Des Moines, Iowa. (It's in the midwest region of US in case you don't know)

With that said, the future of this blog is very uncertain, as I believe any of you who are still checking this blog form time to time probably know me as a close friend. Nevertheless, I might update it once in a while with random stuff, or it may remain dead for quite a while. Still, do not hesitate to leave me a comment there, as I will check it on and off regardless of whether I update it or not, just use the CBOX.

After just a few more days, I'll be mostly free until my flight, which is on the 16th of August, at night at KLIA. If any one of you want to meet up with me before I leave for the states, here's a tentative schedule. Just send me an SMS, or message me on Facebook/Messenger or just call me out:

Exams finish on July the 8th.
Potential vacation trip with friends from July 22-24.
Attending CHS Band's AEOM concert on the night (and maybe afternoon) show(s) on July 25th.
Potential family trip from August 1 - 2.
Probably packing on August 14-15.

Other than that, my schedule is basically free. Book me ASAP for a higher success rate :D

Changing perspectives...

2009-05-20T05:30:00.002+08:00

After getting sick for the umpteenth time lately, I decided to visit my doctor again just to confirm if any lingering "on and off" symptoms are of any concern. What I got in return was more than just assurance, he seemed to be hinting strongly that perhaps it was my own worrying that was enlarging all the symptoms I am having. At this point, only consistent discomfort that would not go away should be worth any worry, and any other sudden reactions, well, it's not really in my control. So I might as well be better off not worrying about it, since there isn't anything I can actually do about it.

Perhaps what is more important that the doctor thinks i need treated is my mentality. I have become accustomed to scanning out all risks to ensure I am always prepared to handle any situation, what I did not expect was that this mentality practically borders on being paranoid about everything. It only makes sense that worrying about them would only waste my life away, as there are other more practical parts of my life that I should give focus to. Why worry about the unknown? The unknown is just that, still unknown, and not yet a reality. Only deal with it when it becomes a reality, not dwell on its possibilities.

Another issue that bothered me lately is how everyone seems to label me as the 'serious one', or something like that. I take pride in having an alternate and more academic perspective to life, but perhaps i have neglected my more carefree attitude which I once possessed in high school. The very 'care-free' attitude which has helped me shrug off countless illnesses and not worry, this seems to be the one mentality that I need to regain, and watching medical drama series episodes (house), the discovery channel, CSI probably won't help, rather, these should be approached with the assurance that most of the facts are not as accurate, and that it is often highly dramatized.

My doctor also told me not to believe things from the internet, claiming that majority of it is rubbish. I have known the facts to be not believable, but months of e-mails on how to detect signs of stroke and HIV needles on cinema seats could be unnerving.

There is perhaps a limit to how risk-averse and careful we should be, and we all ought to strike a balance and remember to live life, and not be afriad of it.

Expressing ourselves...

2009-05-11T03:21:00.003+08:00

I wonder how many of you out there actually still keep a personal diary, something that we can write out our frustrations and emotions - things that are stuck in our head and we just want to let it out badly. Looking carefully at this common habit that many people do (though in the modern age, I'm not sure anymore), I started to look into why keeping a diary may probably be a good thing, and no, I'm not psychologically trained or anything, this is just my own opinion.

The reason we actually need a diary, is often tied to the fact that we want to be understood, to express our thoughts, which probably stems from circumstances whereby we CANNOT express ourselves properly to REAL people. There could be many reasons why we just can't find that right person to talk to, and I'm sure talking to someone about something personal and not talking to anyone obviously leaves a big difference to ourselves. Aristotle once mentioned the concept of "catharsis" which is basically a "purging" of oneself from emotions, whether good or bad ones. He associates it with art, more specifically quoting the act of watching tragic dramas as a way for human beings to purge ourselves from tragic emotions. He reasons that by watching acts of evil and suffering its consequences, we are purged from the temporary and short term benefits that come from doing unwise things, so that we leave the theater "purged" from any intentions to do these deeds. The "catharsis" I am interested in is a slightly different form of purging (and yes, there's probably a technical term to describe this but I'm lazy to research) but again it may be related. Making our thoughts and expressing them is not always a wise thing, but when we make them known to a diary, we are telling them to someone who will not cheat on us, will not take advantage of knowing anything about us, will not respond, will not criticize, will not ridicule, but simply wills us to write with blank spaces. A diary is someone that allows to say whatever we want, with no risks and consequences, and even allows us to read back on our own thoughts in the future. Of course, there are risks of other people reading them, and so the idea of a diary being secret and hidden is not uncommon.

In today's era, writing on paper seems a little old fashioned, though I am sure many people still do it. An electronic alternative for a diary is easily available to anyone with access to a computer, though the trend lately is to "blog" about our thoughts, but blogs (unless completely private and you have not told a single other person about it) are mostly meant for outsiders to read and react to. Blogging would then always have at least one other reader, and with any human readers comes consideration on the writer to ensure that what he or she expresses does not jeopardize his or her image. Thus, it is not possible for one to truly express oneself freely on blogs.

Some may ask: "Why must we express ourselves freely?" "Is there really any reason that we should be able to express any thoughts we harbor?"

My response would be that any thought that cannot be expressed would result in some form of stress and conflict in our minds, in other words, we cannot have "peace of mind", at least not fully. Unless you are one of the very few fortunate people with friends so close that even your deepest most personal things can be shared, a diary is probably the next best thing. This also means that anyone that still uses a diary signifies that this person has limited manners to express themselves, to such an extent that they need to resort to other means as an escape from the social confines of reality.

So are you one of those that still write in a diary?

On a different note, I wrote this entry because I just recently begun to start writing into microsoft word and saving it, (an electronic diary). Infer what you will.

Defining myself.

2009-04-27T05:14:00.002+08:00

Yet another dilemma has appeared before me:

To become truly great in something, to go much deeper into it than many others would, to make it one of my greatest passions, as well as pride, to go through a journey that many would fail halfway, to look back later and be proud that I managed to do this,

or

To remain in touch with all other aspects, to become an all rounder who has tasted a bit of everything, and gone through more perspectives than most other. To not miss out on the many other experiences that would be in my sacrifice list if I were to specialize.

The time where I must decide has come, and I will be thinking long and hard about this one.

Piano lessons?

2009-04-22T00:51:00.003+08:00

I noticed a trends that has stretched back a few decades in Malaysia:

Parents insisting their kids to take piano lessons.

The results?

Kids dropping out halfway, insisting they are not talented in music so they have no future,

or

Kids going all the way to Grade 8, and either stopping there or going on to be piano teachers. Only a very limited few ever progress to a credible future in music from being enrolled in piano lessons.

Why then do parents make this choice in the first place?

I think there are two reasons mainly, to test if their kids might be lucky enough to have undiscovered talent in music, or to help instill discipline in them. They probably think that learning music will instill discipline, as it is an important criteria to excel and proceed to the next grade.

Nevertheless, here's why I think piano lessons are not worth the money, at least not in the manner that parent's are investing in their kids.

First of all, how many people who take piano lessons, as a result of being enforced by their parents, really enjoy music? Even if an individual has very great potential in music, would enrolling them in piano lessons be the best way to develop that talent? This is a big risk on the part of which piano teacher you enroll, there are some that teach to earn, and some who teach with passion. For anyone to develop talent, that person must learn to develop a passion for whatever talent that is. Becoming enthusiastic and passionate for music does not usually come from taking music lessons, because, as the word lesson already shows, it is done not purely for enjoyment.

Secondly, and perhaps more importantly so, learning piano lessons forgo two important aspects of music: learning about intonation, and learning about ensemble. Why? Because the piano is a keyboard instrument, and the student would not learn much about pitching until he or she progresses to the level of performing with other musicians. I acknowledge that the value of learning the piano lies in the ability to perform solo, without any need of accompaniment to sound like a complete performance, but learning to play with other people would be just as enjoyable. We could compare to video games, where most gamers would admit that elements of teamwork and multi-player cooperative challenges are the most attractive elements that is sought after in today's games. Learning to perform with others are crucial training for the individual to survive in a working or corporate environment in the future where a single talented or disciplined individual would still contribute little to the entire corporation or firm.

As such, I have a simple proposal to all parents who think that sending their kids to music school is a perfect choice to instill discipline and detect if their child has a knack for music: Let them learn a wind instrument, or better yet, send them into a school band. It is much easier for individuals to develop a talent or passion for something if they're having fun doing it at the same time. At the very least, the excessive usage of air to produce sound would only lower the risks of lung infection...

Dun test my english hor.........!

2009-03-30T19:17:00.004+08:00

Here's an e-mail I got from a friends recently...

You might like this forwarded gem.
This is hilarious... ..even an Englishman could not construct sentences using numerics, which is exclusive only to Malaysians and Singaporeans.
Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9,10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with: 1 day I go 2 climb a 3 outside a house to peep. But the couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rushed out and wanted to 5 with me. I ran until I fell 6 and threw up. So I go into 7-eleven and grabbed some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab at him. 10 God he run. 10 I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7-eleven. Next day I called my boss and told him I was 6. He said 5 , tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also asked me to go climb a 3 and jump down! I don't understand. I am so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.

The bubble bursts

2009-03-02T02:35:00.002+08:00

Feb 26, Thursday. I was driving home from college, and I started feeling as if my leg was gonna cramp up again. Within the next 2-3 minutes, my whole body felt really uneasy, as if it were going into overdrive. I quickly stopped the car at the roadside, and rested a while taking deep breaths. I continued my journey after a sip of water. 5 minutes later, I felt very uneasy again, and I parked outside a bridal shop. I got out of the car and felt like I was going to faint. Thankfully for the kind shop owners, they allowed me to go in and rest awhile. Feeling as if I could no longer drive back home (it was only another 15 minute drive), I called my mom for help. She came with my dad and picked me up to see the doctor, while my dad drove my car home.

Relating my incident to the doctor, he checked my blood pressure, heart rate, temperature and blood sugar level. He says everything seems fine, as I did feel as if whatever happened to me has passed, but I was clearly very shaken. The doctor suggests that what I had, was called a panic attack. A panic attack happens when a person starts getting too anxious, gets trapped with repeated worried thoughts, and starts hyperventilating (increasing the amount of oxygen intake). The person then feels as if he or she is short of breath, and breathes in more. This results in that person expelling carbon dioxide too fast, leading to faint like symptoms (try breathing really really fast and you will get what I mean), and breathe even more, making this a vicious cycle. The doctor suggested breathing into a paper bag for a while to breathe back the CO2 if i ever get a panic attack again, but more importantly, he asks me if I've been over stressed lately.

Thinking back over the last few months, I have been very stressed indeed. With my perfectionist attitude and always pushing myself to perform better, I realized the mental strain I must have been taking looks enormous.

I went back to read up a bit more about stress, and learned a few important things. Stress happens when events happen in our lives, and our body has an in-built system to react to stress: the "fight or flight" response. When we feel stress, we either try to fight it, or try to run away from it. Unfortunately, in today's urbanized society, stress is everywhere, and there's no real way of running away from it. Thus, we have to change our mentality to adapt to stress, and find ways to reduce the levels of stress in our body. Exercise is one very good way to do so. As our body gears up to produce extra energy in order to 'fight' or 'flee', most of us suppress this energy because we deal with the stress in a repressed manner. If we do not exercise to use up this built up tension in our body, muscle will stiffen and ache, and all kinds of illnesses will affect our body.

As I think back to the illnesses that has bugged me (remember those food poisoning incidents?) I realize that perhaps an overload of stress is a more reasonable explanation for my decline in health these few months.

As such, here is a lesson for me, and a warning for all of you. In search of success and to rise above our competitive world, do remember to take good care of your physical and mental well being. Exercising three times a week (of any kind) for at least 20 minutes each will be very beneficial in reducing our regular stress, and always give ourselves a little comfort zone. I am trying to see things more optimistically now and to not push myself too hard, or expect too much.

Just a peek...

2009-02-24T02:40:00.003+08:00

It's been quite a while since my last update, which probably shows how busy I've been for the last few weeks.

Firstly, a big thank you for those who did remember my birthday, though for those who could SMS but only sent me facebook wishes, "YOU CHEAPSKATES, AM I WORTH LESS THAN 10 cents?" haha, just j/k.

Anyway, life has been very very busy for me these few weeks, partly due to my greediness in taking classes this semester. Here's a breakdown:

Calculus III
Not much of a choice here, it's my core subject, and I really like lecturer. Her teaching style and speed suits me very well, not much stress here either, except on the day before quizzes.

Statistics
Taken over after three weeks by my Calculus lecturer, most of it is really a piece of cake when compared to calculus. Again, barely any stress here.

Macroeconomics
My new lecturer (which took over the class after the previous one got stabbed in front of his door and went to the hospital. It's true, but he's discharged now, but he's not gonna take back macroeconomics) is a rather strange person. He lectures well, but I find his character rather questionable. He seems not to think we care about our marks (bad news for us) and his style of teaching seems more UK-ish style, which means his quizzes test for a lot of memorizing rather than application (even harder to score). His assignments seem a little tedious as well. A significant amount of stress here for the quizzes and assignments.

Malaysian Studies
This is arguably the most relaxed class, although the quizzes and assignments are rather normal. Why? Firstly, she spends her three hour lecture in this manner, half an hour of clearing up stuff on assignment and replacements, one hour of lecturing (which is mostly criticism of our government, and this turns out to be a good way to help us remember our points), another half an hour for us to discuss our assignments and quizzes (yes, group quizzes!). Then she lets us leave an hour early (probably to avoid traffic, as the class is 3:30pm to 6:30 pm). I'm not complaining because firstly, this is a forced class that we have to take before going overseas, and I think she's making it far more useful for us than any normal lecturer for this subject would. Secondly, the final grade for this subject is not included in our cGPA, which makes no difference whether I get an A, B, C, or P. (It's not even on my transcript) Not much stress here.

Introduction to Anthropology
This is the killer subject, and the one that I knew would make me suffer if I took it. For what reason did I take this then? Firstly, this is a social science subject, which I had to take one eventually and so, why not now. Secondly, I really look up to my anthropology lecturer because she really has almost every single trait that I find respectable for a lecturer. She adjusts her course requirements according to her standards moreso than to the department's requirements, she makes almost every single decision with her concerns mainly at her students and as fairly as possible. She lectures in such a manner that students will be immersed into the subject and see the interesting and useful aspects of it, and she's very professional in the manner in which she grades and when she offers consultation. Did I also mention that she gives about 2 X as much work as all the other lecturers? (Except for one of her colleagues, which is equally insane) I find this class as the ultimate test on whether you would suffer to learn more, or take easy classes just to get better grades. Past seniors have all told me that if I could survive her class, I could survive any environment in the US (workload-wise). What workload do I get from this class? Weekly journals to update on everything we've learnt and all our reactions to the class topics covered, an ongoing research which would likely involve a survey to obtain results, to be handed up at the end of the semesters, tutorial presentations every week (most of us have to present once every four weeks) based on academic articles from our reader, covering diverse topics on anthropology, quizzes based on our text-book (3 in total for the semester), and finally, forum discussions online on topics covered in class as an extension to keep us thinking. Scary? I have friends who are taking two classes by her at the same time, and she structures the workload the same way for all her classes.

So that's about how my life has been going so far, and for those who are still unaware, I have already applied to two universities in the United Stated of America to complete my degree through the American Degree Program. Provided everything goes smoothly, I will be leaving for the States in August, and won't be back till late 2011 or early 2012.

Accumulated Cost...

2009-01-18T18:08:00.003+08:00

Around $15,000 for Living Costs, including summer,
Around $30,000 for Tution Costs, including summer classes,
Around $4,000 for traveling expenses,
Around $1,000 for insurance and misc. fees.

All this per year,
Estimated 2 years there to complete a degree.

$100,000 for a bachelor's degree???

Can that degree even earn me back that much money???

Let's make an example. If I were to save RM2,000 into my bank each month, do you know how long it would take to save up $100,000?

14 years and 7 months!

Am I supposed to blow that up in 2 years to get a degree?

Why is it so expensive to get GOOD education?

Sweeping Success...

2009-01-04T18:54:00.002+08:00

Finally, after so many tries (actually less than 10 :p), I finally managed to complete:

Minesweeper, expert mode!

Yeah, it's only my first success in this mode (not easy) and it took me 793 seconds! that's 13 minutes and 13 seconds! some coincidence...

Summing up the year that was...

2009-01-01T04:25:00.002+08:00

The year 2008 was quite a roller coaster ride for me; I’ve probably changed more than I ever have in the past years added together in this year alone. It was a year of discovery and self enlightenment. College has really broadened my perspective of the world, and brought me to face many difficult challenges, some which I was not well prepared to face, but still I’ve pulled through. Nevertheless, I am now much more conscious of what I have to work on, since I’ll likely be out of this country on my own before the next New Year.

The biggest change, which happened most rapidly in my last semester, is that I am now much more aware of what is happening, and think more deeply about things than I used to. I have to give credit to my philosophy class for making this change in me; the subject alone has definitely changed my way of thinking and the way I perceive things. And I’ll use this New Year post to try and convince you to do the same.

I strongly recommend anyone who feels empty and ‘at a loss’, or feels like life has hit a dead end, to walk into a bookstore, go to the philosophy section, and pick out any book that gives an overview on philosophy. Unless you already think critically and love trying to understand really complicated ideas, I recommend you not to dive into books on works by specific philosophers such as Plato, David Hume, and Immanuel Kant. Get a book that speaks plain simple English first, or you’ll be even more lost after reading it.

Why is it worth knowing things that may not be practically useful in our lives? Firstly I must challenge this common assumption that many people have, that Philosophy is meaningless, and that it is not practical to apply in our lives. Philosophy will only be meaningless and impractical if you read it like a story book, if you treat the ideas and concepts as just a person’s figment of imagination. To really engage in an author’s words and immersing oneself into these ideas and concepts, to try and see the world from his or her perspective (Yes, there ARE female philosophers too), by appreciating a different point of view of the world, we can become more aware of our own point of view, its strengths, and its faults. Broadening our perspective can help us to avoid biased and narrow minded ideas, which will lead us to make decisions in our lives which we might come to regret one day. Getting too deep here? Here’s a good method I learned to simplify things – giving an example.

Here’s an example of philosophy which I have learned, and I believe makes a difference in my life. Immanuel Kant, in his ethics, asserted that we must not treat human beings as “a means to an end, but rather as an end in itself.” In plain English, he’s saying that we can’t treat human lives as a method or trade off for our own benefits, such as killing a person to get his or her inheritance. We need to treat human lives as an end in itself, acknowledging that human life itself is sacred and cannot be undermined or degraded into just a means to an end. If people only remember this concept throughout their lives, they’ll probably think twice before making the costly mistakes, many of which we have seen not only in movies, but in the newspapers as well. These murderers end up thinking about their actions from their own narrow perspectives, believing that there are things more important than human life, and they try to act “utilitarian” and look only at the consequences.

I’m not saying that they are wrong, because a key part of philosophy is realizing that there is no right answer. The whole point of philosophy is not to give you the answer, but to give you a better perspective so that you make the decision you really want, without being limited by a narrow perspective.

It’s frightening to many when they realize that philosophy is a subject that throws more questions rather than answers at its readers. Perhaps it realized something that many of us did not – To improve our lives, we don’t need answers, we just need the right questions thrown at us, and we will come up with our own answers, our own opinions. When we look for answers, it is normally when we have a decision to make which we are not sure which one to choose, or that we are faced with a situation in which we are at a loss, not knowing what to do. Perhaps we should realize that when we have a question, being given “The answer” is not what we really need. When a person facing a dilemma of staying faithful to his loyal wife, or going out for a one-night-stand with another woman with a high chance of not letting his wife find out, what does he really need? “The right thing is to be faithful and loyal because these are the better qualities” or “What is more important in your life? A life free of guilt and of good values or a life more full of pleasures and experiences?”

To some, learning to open up their perspectives through philosophy can be so difficult that they just give up and say “this is too deep for me. I can’t understand what it means.” They would then just live a ‘practical life’ and get on with ‘more important things’ than these difficult questions.

But here’s something to think about. When you hit a dead end or a crisis in your life, if you lose a close friend, or a close relatives, or all of them, if you lose all your possessions, if you lose your job and your ambitions, what would you do? Kill yourself? The purpose of your life, your own answer to “why am I here” is perhaps more important than anything else you have at this moment. That answer is the most important thing that will keep you going when you’ve lost all the superficial desires of our time. Sadly, there are many people who run from this question, and fear to give a definite answer.

A glance at the “Self improvement” and “Self help” will reveal the modern day “philosophers”, trying to answer the “big questions” of our time, but they give answers and not questions to us. They tell us what to do, how to solve problems, yet many people find these books very self enlightening. We need to realize that the only real answers we need must come from ourselves, otherwise, are you even living your own life? Or are you just following a pre-written script?

How would it feel if, at the end of your life, you look back at your whole life, and realized that this whole time, you didn’t know what you really wanted to do, that everything you did was for other reasons, and not because you really wanted to do these things? Some people say they want to go to school, get top grades, get to college and university, get a degree, a stable job, a family, lots of money, and a luxurious post-retirement life, but is this really what you want to do? Or is this just something “most people do” and you’re just following it? You can’t live a life without regrets if you’re doing things only for other people and not yourself.

And this sums up my New Year resolution for 2009, to find out what I really want, and waste no more time in achieving that. What about you?

Promoting a special kind of medicine...

2008-12-12T20:49:00.002+08:00

I know of one medicine that most people need, and probably don't get enough of each day.

Of course this medicine I'm talking about is not a drug,

it's

LAUGHTER

There are many ways to find this medicine, in fact here's one way a highly recommend:

Watch/Download/Buy the series "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"

It's the only thing in the last few months to give me sore cheek muscles from grinning so much XD

Nagging problems...

2008-12-02T17:38:00.002+08:00

After suffering 2 rounds of food poisoning and a multitude of side-effects over the last month and a half, I'm still not feeling normal with regards to my health even till today.

Noticable side-effects:
Lost weight (I was around 64Kg before my first food poisoning, after which, I dropped to around 59-60. One month later, I'm currently at around 58-59)
Diarrhea on and off (only very serious after food poisoning)
Slight headaches (only lasting no longer than 5 minutes, not frequent, and only appears after certian meals)
Slight muscle weakness (mostly in legs, but I can still walk, run, play badminton, just feels a little sore at times, more frequent in cold temperatures)
Muscle twitching (not sure if this is the right term, it's when your muscles have some kind of impulse and seems to shiver for a while)
Depression on and off (sudden mood losses, normally lasting only a while)
Bloatedness in stomach (though it's been better lately)
Slight discomfort in my abdomen (but not often)
At times, low blood pressure, and a slightly lower temperature than usual (36-37), though I'm not sure if this is normal as well.

I have visited 2 doctors after being food poisoned, but they have only diagnosed my stomach (intestines actually) with lots of gas, giving me medicine to relieve them.

At this point, I've been keeping a food dairy, keeping track of what food I take and which ones seem to cause problems. Also, I've noticable started burping after almost every meal, and I'm not sure if that is normal either. ( I almost never burped before the first round of food poisoning)

A friend of mine suggested that for these long term symptoms that are not severe, maybe I should try seeking a Chinese Medical Practitioner instead of normal western doctors. Another possible alternative for me is to visit a gastroenterologist (a doctor specializing in digestive related issues).

What should I do? These symptoms have been rather distracting for me lately...

Almost over... so much more to come...

2008-11-24T20:48:00.003+08:00

Today is Monday, by next Friday my third semester (and first year) in college would officially end.

It's interesting how much I've changed through this one year (more change than any of my past 17, including getting food poisoned 2 times =.=) and i guess i do feel a little older than I should (I'm still a teenager!)

Memo to "The 10": If we are going to S'pore for New Year, we should decide on who to organize the trip (either a few of us, all of us [quite impossible], or one of our parents/relatives/friends as volunteers) . Of course, Singapore is only one destination, we could still go to other places, but I doubt that we wanna go to a beach resort again...(too many beach trips last year). Any ideas? I would SO look forward to this trip if we do organize one in the end.

*This is provided Keng Onn and Gabriel don't fall off the bridge at Taman Negara that is...j/k XD

Upcoming events:
26/11 Spanish Presentation
27-30/11 Study for finals
1-5/12 Finals
5-7/12 Friend's church music event
13/12 Help Ultimate Open
19/12 MPO
20/12 PJYSB Concert
(21-23) or (25-27)/12 family trip to S'pore
28/12 Mamma Mia!
??/12 to ??/1 Trip to S'pore?

Anyone bored in between these dates just call me for any outing XD I should be free as long as I'm not held up in rehearsals for the PJYSB concert.

Mini-update

2008-11-19T00:41:00.002+08:00

Just a quick glance at what happened over the last few busy weeks...

2 presentations down (2 more to go)
3 assignments done (1 more calculus II assignment that just came out this week)

and that's it! most of my project stuff are done (hooray) so what's left now is to study for Finals...

...plus loads of activity upcoming, including:

Singing Spanish Songs
MPO
Friend's college event
HELP Ultimate Open
PJYSB
Friend's church music event
MPO again
Concert Performance
Mamma Mia
(Hopefully) Going to S'pore with "The 1o" for New Year XD

...and numerous outings in between...

Looking Optimistic XD

A very good friend...

2008-11-10T19:03:00.003+08:00

You're the reason I have not gone mad from stress and pressure

You're the reason I am not screaming every now and then to everyone

You would bring me so much grief and pain if I lost you

So I would like to extend my gratitude to you

THANK YOU!

to

my most faithful... planner XD

Triple Tag + Weird stuff + YShuian's tag response

2008-11-02T15:56:00.007+08:00

Tagged by Furbz

You,We They...

1. Apa nama lu?
Once again, if you don't already know, you shouldn't be reading this blog XD

Upload 3 pictures that have you.

Jumpers '08

"The 10" + me

I just love this pic XD

2. Name me your top 5 friends

1. "The 10"
2. GayLou™
3. Dearest band members/ex-members
4. High School mates
5. Colelge mates

3. Are they true to you? Why?

Yes, because they're FRIENDS

4.Which of them you trust the most?

I have already prioritized them according to trust.

5.Who would you rather find to talk your problems with?

Again, in order of priority.

6. Are you in love?
Probably, but maybe not with any humans yet.

7. Who is that person?
Now why would I even think of posting it here?

8.Have you ever hug?
Things? yeah. Animals? yeah. People? well... some...

9.Would you choose love over friends or friends over love? Why?
I'll split it equally, because they are both equally important to me.

10.How long had you currently love this person (including when you met)
No answer may be given at this specific point in time.

11.Describe that person
Someone I won't regret?

12. If you're dumped and you still like that person, will you wait? Why?
I'll answer you when that finally happens, so STAY TUNED XD

13.Is it appropriate for people in the age of teenage to be in a relation?
Of course, as long as it does not stray to sexual relations...

14. Will it last? Estimate.
Depends on the person really, but likely not (if it's sexual)

15. Will you cry if you lost someone you love?a) How Long? b) Why?
I would be shocked if I don't. How long? As long as I would (How can we decide these things...) Why? Because I'm HUMAN

16. Will you go back to your ex, though both of you had changed?
DoC (Depends on Circumstances)

17. Had anything ruin your love relation before?a) What is it?
Incompatibility

18. Is life worthless without love? Why?
To me it is, a life not lived fully to all its aspects (positive ones) is not worth much.

19.What would you do, if you're stressed out?
Cope with it by relaxing or talking with someone about it.

20. Does hurting yourself helps?
Not in the long run XD

21. Are you REALLY into the one you had a crush on now?
Not that I have one at the moment to think about...

22.What did he do, that you love that person so much?
Answer not available.

23. What is pain inside?
What do you mean 'inside'? In our body? Then it's because something is hurting us...

24. What song reminds you of your crush?
No particular song yet.

25.What day is the happiest day with your crush? Why?
No exact answer for this question.

You, Hygeine, Environment...

1.How many times do you bath a day?
1-2 times a day

2.Do you often wash your hair?
almost every day.

3.If your friend is a dirty, smelly person, would you say something?
Depends on that friend, I probably would though.

4.If someone, your friend or your love ones FART in front of you, what is your reaction?
Oh c'mon, everyone does it, your body is unhealthy if it doesn't, so what's the big deal?

5. Are pimples something that make you feel people will feel "eek-ish"?a) Do you have them?
To some yes, and yes I do have some.

People I tag
Anyone who wants to do this.

2nd Tag
(Also by Furbz)

1. YOUR REAL NAME
Why do I need to tell you? Ask me yourself.

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 3 letters of real name plus nizzle)
P&C

3.YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal)
Blue Dog?

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and the street you live on)
P&C

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name)
P&C

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (color of your underwear, favorite candy )
Green Milo Nuggets... wat de...

7. YOUR JAPANESE NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, first two letters of your middle name, last two letters of your first name then last three letters of your last name )
P&C

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets)
Black Biscuit, Black Rocky

Tagging:
Anyone who wants to do this.

3rd Tag
(By Hollie)

RULE #1
People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

RULE #2
Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse.
These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. What day is it?
Sunday

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
I get to live longer than 100 years XD

3. Have you ever thought of committing suicide? Tried before? How?
Though about this topic, but never about me doing it.

4. What would you do if you won the Miss Universe?
Slap myself awake.

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
It's a possibility, as long as it's not my guy friends.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
I guess the former is more obvious to me, but both are equally important.

7. What would be the most ideal way to wake up to in the morning?
To wake up feeling fresh and energetic.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
Try to move on, seriously, but do keep in touch if possible.

9. If you like to act with someone, who will it be? Your gf/bf or an actress/actor?
Depends on my mood XD

10. Will you invite for Ex bf/gf to your wedding dinner?
Why not?

11.Do you support premarital sex?
For various reasons, no.

12. What makes u happy??
Lots of things XD (It's YOUR job to find it out)

13. What's the first thing you do when you wake up?
Open my eyes? I guess it would be stretching after that XD

14. Would you give all in a relationship?
Respect yourself enough to retain some control and dignity over yourself.

15. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
Honestly I don't think it's possible, because I have never experienced it before, so I can't really say how.

16. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
Choosing not to forgive is only an extra burden on ourselves, but forgetting something bad could be unwise.

17. is there someone who u dislike or despise rite now??
Yeah, lots of people ---> People who are not even making an effort to be considerate (like our many M'sian drivers for example)

18. If your girlfriend/boyfriend told u that she/he is actually the prime minister's son/daughter, wat would u do?
I would whack her for lying, c'mon, how can we not know who is the son or daughter of the prime minister? She must be lying...

I tag:
Anyone who wants to do this

The weird stuff (Courtesy of Furbz again)

Dear Furbz,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our horoscope doesn't match. I think I realized it last year and I saw you carve your initials into the crazy monk. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand how awful I felt. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I always wanted to drink Oprah Winfrey imitations.

Best regards,
Exodus

It's a joke. XD. For anyone who wants to try just copy and paste the following and fill in the right answers. Have fun XD (Mine looks horrible though)

Dear (the last person who left a comment on your journal):

I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___. I think I realized it ___2___ ___3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___ .

___12___,
-Your name

1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister

2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes

3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kabob - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife

4. What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out

5. What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard soufflé
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - The crazy monk

6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
O.C. - Emotional
One Tree Hill - Open
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
House - Scarred
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Mongolic
Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
None of the above - Ashamed

7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I've felt
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we're cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this.
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyous - That I'm open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks

8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service

9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David's tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college

10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked

11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Our friendship
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whisky - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics

12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - Fuck off now
France - In pain
Other - Greetings to your freaky family

And finally, YShuian's tag response

The last person to tag you is?
-YShuian

What relationship of you with him/her?
friend/good friend/very good friend/same band/same section/same instrument/same age... we're both in the "11"

Your 5 impression towards him/her.
a) Passionate about her work
b) Thoughtful
c) Open and straight forward
d) Energetic (fatigue seems not to be in her vocabulary)
e) Adventurous (in lifestyle, big contrast to other girls XD)

The most memorable thing that he/she had done for you.
The clearest picture sticking out is her representing the "10" and giving me my 18th Birthday card XD

The most memorable thing that he/she has say to you.
"You can do it"

If he/she becomes your lover, you will…
Go on with my life?

If he/she becomes your enemy, you will
Smack her till she realizes I'm her friend?

If he/she becomes your lover , he/she has to improve on..
Haha, don't let me catch you going 24 hours without sleep just for your assignments la, bad for your health...

If he/she becomes your enemy , the reason is...
There is no reason! Reason would not make her become my enemy.

The most desirable things to you to do to him/her
-Remain helpful supportive friends for the rest of our lives

The overall impression to he/her is
In one word - ENERGY

Tagged again...

2008-10-24T18:43:00.003+08:00

The last person to tag you is?
-Courtesy of Hollie

What relationship of you with him/her?
-Primary School/Secondary School/Bandmate/ Still in same college but different department XD

Your 5 impression towards him/her.
a) Lively
b) Supportive
c) Socially active
d) A good listener
e) Faithful to her religion, family and friends

The most memorable thing that he/she had done for you.
-Spending time with me (Anything from messaging to eating to chatting)

The most memorable thing that he/she has say to you.
-Well, there isn't any particularly striking thing she said to me, so the most memorable one is probably the one that lightens me up the most: "How are you?"

If he/she becomes your lover, you will…
-be happy? Anyone should if they have a lover XD

If he/she becomes your enemy, you will
-slap her till she realizes that she shouldn't be my enemy...

If he/she becomes your lover , he/she has to improve on..
-erm, basic motherhood skills lo XD You know la, cooking, sewing... basic stuff, lover-wise i don't see how she can improve lo XD

If he/she becomes your enemy , the reason is...
-hmm I would think the biggest reason is she lost faith...

The most desirable things to you to do to him/her
-Remain helpful supportive friends for the rest of our lives

The overall impression to he/her is
Quite a likable person, nothing strikingly bad that I know of yet

How do you think the people around you will feel about you?
-Many people say I'm smart, but there are so many that are smarter. It would make more sense to say I'm sincere and believe in good will.

The character for you for yourself is?
-Rather laid back, relaxed and reflective, though at times I may get anxious, angry, paranoid or distressed... but I try to avoid staying in that kind of personality.

On the contrary , the thing you hate about yourself is?
-Why hate myself? I don't see why we should ever hate ourselves, we just need to take responsibility of our lives and our choices. If we do that, there is nothing to hate really...

The most ideal person you want to be is?
-A jack of all trades, so I can choose and experience what I want.

For the person who cares and likes you, say something about them.
-Thank you so much! I really appreciate it XD

Ten people to tag:
1 Keng Onn (Wahaha, update XD)
2 Yee Shuian (Looking eagerly towards your comments)
3 Sie Lein (Take some time off and blog ler XD)
4 Hollie (Haha, your turn to do mine)
5 Patricia (Hope you have the time to)
6 Gabriel (This will do your blog some good, trust me)
7 Seou Yuen (Haha, wanna know what you think XD)
8 Sher Mann (Lol, do this if you're bored la)
9 Tofuking (You need to update too!)
10 Furbz (Hope this doesn't bother you too much)

Who is no.2 having relationship with?
I believe the best answer is... her assignments...

Is no.3 a female or a male?
X Y chromosome...

If no.7 and no.10 be together would it be a good thing?
Awkward? They know each other anyway.

How about no.5 and 8?
They've been in the same section for 4 years anyway, height is now an issue though XD

What is number 1 studying for?
Studying in Form 6 at the moment, wanted to be an architect but seems undecided for now.

When was the last time you have chat with them?
-1,2,4,6,8,9 last few days, 3,5,7 last few weeks, 10... since last year unless facebook and blogs count XD

Is number 4 a single?
-Hmm... On and off I think, but if you're interested just let me know, I'll ARRANGE it for you XD

Talk something about no.2.
-Very adventurous and energetic person (most of the time at least), great and supportive friend especially throughout my five years of high school (Saxophone rox XD) and one of the few who still visits this blog frequently haha. Mature in thought and action, but still able to immerse herself in childish pleasures (Don't ever lose this!)

Hope I didn't give any wrong information, if there are any, please let me know in order to correct them asap. Sorry for tagging you guys, but I would appreciate it if you guys do it XD

A peek into my busy schedule...

2008-10-23T14:59:00.002+08:00

Haha, I know many of you probably aren't interested in how my workload is in ADP, but just in response to those who still have the mentality that ADP is really just All Day Play, or that we have a much easier time than A-Levels, here's a peek at what I have to do in the coming weeks.

3/11/08
Spanish Quiz No. 3

6/11/08
Moral Environment Presentation

7/11/08
Philosophy Presentation on "A Critique on Utilitarianism"

12/11/08
Organizing the maths corner in the upcoming Science Fair by Techno Science Club

13/11/08
Due Date for Moral Group Assignment regarding ethics (3000 Words across 4 members)

14/11/08
Philosophy Quiz No. 3 (covering about 137 pages)
Philosophy Group Assignment (A research paper on Yin Yang and Taoist Metaphysics, 3000 Words across 3 group members including me)
Philosophy Journal Submission (12 weeks worth of Journals which includes a summary of every lecture and tutorial of the week, our personal opinion on the topic covered, and any additional incidents or thoughts that may affect our view towards our career or goals, every single week [How can she grade all this? She has around 90 students...])

17/11/08
Spanish Quiz No. 4

25/11/08
Calculus II Quiz No. 3

24-26/11/08
Spanish presentation (10 minutes of Spanish dialogue XD) on camping in the mountains

19,21,26 or 28/11/08
Philosophy presentation (15 minutes approx on research topic)

1-6/12/08
Finals for this semester (4 2-hour-papers in total for 4 subjects - Moral Studies, Spanish, Calculus II and Intro. to Western Philosophy)

...and that's 4 subjects while one of them is a LAN subject (moral studies) while we are normally supposed to do 4-5 subjects a semester. Still think ADP is easy? I'd like to hear YOUR workload in whatever course you're taking now XD

Messenger Woes...

2008-10-12T01:32:00.002+08:00

My Windows Live Messenger requested an update and after doing so, turned out to have some weird problems signing in. After trying numerous solutions, deleting and re-installing it, it seems that the latest version isn't compatible with my PC configuration. After half a day, I resorted to clearing everything off and installing an older version, of which none seem to work because it keeps telling me that I already have an older version installed (but i cleared them all!). I tried almost everything, clearing up all traces of Windows Live, rebooting in between deleting and re=installing, and even cleaning up the registry files related to Windows Live.

So after spending a whole day on it, I decided the easiest way now for me would be to wait till I get an external hard disk, backup everything, and just reformat my com. Till then, I will be using Meebo, which I think doesn't support sending files. Thus, if there is any urgent need to send me files (for whatever reason), you would have to e-mail it to me (yahoo account please, thanks).

It's a pity, because Windows Live Messengerwas working so well for me right up till today...

Disturbing news...

2008-10-09T23:57:00.002+08:00

I started a habit of looking through the Star newspapers everyday now since my house subscribed a copy everyday anyway. I began to notice depressing murders/suicides/paranoia creating news on occasion, and I am beginning to dread reading the nation section these days. My mom reckons it's important so that we know how to protect ourselves and be more aware, and in terms of scams and safety I agree. However, some incidents just does not make sense, and it would seem as if people would die anytime without warning from any kind of cause... makes my day gloomy every time I see these news articles. Why aren't there more happy and cheerful parts in the newspaper that could brighten our days up?

Turning green...

2008-09-21T00:58:00.004+08:00

It started on Thursday night.

I went to play a little sports with my friend.

After that, I thought I was going to cramp again, which was weird, because I did nothing that encouraged cramps, such as drinking cold drinks, staying in air-conditioned places, and strenuous exercises.

Went to college on Friday morning, feeling my leg muscles weakened. (Similar to my near cramp experience a week before)

Tried to eat food high in potassium, thinking I was lacking them.

Ate bananas.

After a normal dinner, I started feeling horrible at night.

I felt weak all over, as if I was about to get sick.

Felt like I was lacking oxygen.

Felt like my brain was overworking, as if it just couldn't shut off.

Felt rather depressed and paranoid, not knowing what was wrong.

Things that I normally enjoyed had barely any feeling anymore, but I could still use my five senses.

Couldn't sleep despite lacking sleep.

Felt weird discomfort, but no pain (psychological pain?).

Managed to force myself to sleep (after a long time).

Woke up one hour later (Why??) and couldn't sleep again.

Tried to watch TV and do homework, felt to distracted and uncomfortable to do either.

Ended up reading a nice book "Sophie's World" for about 90 minutes, finally fell asleep from tiredness.

Woke up 12 hours later (Saturday morning) feeling slightly better, but still weak.

Went to play badminton with friends and felt physically weak after that.

Lacking any appetite at all, forced myself to eat porridge.

Rested more and read more books on sofa.

I was still a little paranoid on what was happening, because it couldn't be a virus or I would have had a fever already, and more potassium doesn't seem to help.

Then it finally hit me, I had FOOD POISONING.

(Correct me if I am wrong on this part)

As food is digested and goes to the duodenum onwards, the nutrients from the food are absorbed into the bloodstream. Now imagine if something toxic or poisonous got there. What happens? Poison starts flowing everywhere through your body, EVEN TO YOUR BRAIN. So all that depressing/paranoid/weakness, all came from this. (And I can already imagine myself a shade of green with green poisonous bubbles popping up over my head RPG style.)

As I am typing now, I am slowly recovering from this illness (and feeling surprisingly optimistic), and I am thankful that it happened on a Friday night, as I had no class the next day (sorry HELP Jumpers for missing Sunway Open).

Funnily enough, this incident has made me live in a VERY healthy manner for the past day, drinking water non-stop, no cold stuff, no food that is overnight or possibly not healthy, no air-con, loads of fresh air and open windows. Most of all, I don't remember ever spending so much time just chatting with my mom, because that was for the most part the only thing that really managed to distract me from my discomfort. (Thanks mom!)

What I hope everyone can learn from is that WE SHOULD ALL BE CAREFUL ON WHAT WE EAT. Unless you're dying to experience what I did, stay away from roadside food, unclean food, contaminated food and so on. Also, remember to always wash your hands before eating with them.

What if...

2008-09-14T01:37:00.002+08:00

What happens when, one by one, everything you have assumed and believed in turned out to be wrong?

Who would you go to?

What would you do?

Do you still have purpose?

Do you still have anything to trust?

Is this Enlightenment or mental breakdown?

If through all this, there would still be someone standing by your side, you have really nothing to fear.

De Ja Vu...

2008-09-07T23:42:00.001+08:00

It's happening again.
I'm feeling affected again.
Another bond created,
for better or worse?

Emotion...

2008-08-29T02:42:00.002+08:00

How many of us have spent a little time to think about this commonly used word - emotion?

What is emotion?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emotion
(for those of you who want an answer)

Emotion is a key feature in animals, especially humans. Emotion is sometimes shown as the opposite to logic and rational thinking. Interestingly, humans who are emotionally overwhelmed cannot think logically and rationally, but not the other way around. We can use logic and reasoning to control our actions, but we cannot override our emotions. If Mr A is sad because his mother passed away, no amount of logical reasoning and rational thinking will be able to remove that sadness. He can control how he takes it though; he can choose to weep in bed for the next ten days or still go to work, but he cannot remove that sadness - emotion is a part of human nature.

I have a recent experience I would like to share - I had a very strange dream this morning, and in that dream I felt emotions that I remember feeling years ago. It goes without saying that most of us can easily forget facts, names, dates, events, but it is very hard to forget strong emotions that we have felt in the past. As I write now, I cannot remember the actual events of the dream, the words of a conversation, the setting or condition, yet I strongly remember what I felt in that dream, an emotion that has affected me so much that I am right now typing this to you.

I was, and might still be, emotionally disturbed from that dream, but as i picture myself in the present, something clicked in my head. I have matured, evolved, changed from the person I was in the past. If the same circumstances occur to me right now, I would not feel the same thing. Those feelings I felt, were feelings of the past, an illusion. The acceptance of this statement was the only thing that effectively helped me let go of this 'disturbance' to my mind. Some people told me "Just try to forget about it and move on." Some people told me "Dreams are dreams, this is real life, whatever happens there should not affect you here," but I was affected. I felt very distracted and emotional, I could not concentrate on my work. It turned out that the realization of which these emotions are no longer attached to me was what really allowed me to let it go.

I apologize if I sound too philosophical and paranoid, studying philosophy is doing funny things to my mind at the moment, but I welcome any thoughts on this.

For the badminton/video game fans

2008-08-12T17:38:00.001+08:00

I just found out that badminton flash games do exist, though they're not common, here's an interesting one i found :

http://www.badminton-information.com/badminton-game.html

Have fun! =)

The Great Beethoven Fallacy

2008-08-06T20:34:00.003+08:00

The following is extracted from Richard Dawkin's "The God Delusion"

Have you ever heard the story or received an email that asked you:

"About the terminating of pregnancy, I want your opinion. The father was
syphilitic, the mother tuberculous. Of the four children born, the first
was blind, the second died, the third was deaf and dumb, the fourth was also
tuberculous. What would you have done?

I would have
terminated the pregnancy.

Then you would have killed Beethoven."

Here I express in my own words Dawkins' opinion on why this argument is in fact, not very logical at all:

First of all, this scenario contained inaccuracies regarding Beethoven's family, quoting his own research, "It was completely false. ... [Beethoven] was the eldest - strictly number two, but his elder sibling died in infancy, as was common in those days,"

In any case, if we were to use the logic that every abortion would have a chance of killing a future musical genius, it would be correct to claim that "chaste abstinence" would be doing the very same thing. "[t]o borrow one of Roald Dahl's dark short stories, an equally fortuitous decision not to have an abortion in 1888 gave us Adolf Hitler." Of the forty three 'pro-life' websites quoting a version of the Beethoven legend that Dawkins found through a google search, not one of them pointed out the illogic in this argument. Using the logic that abortion is killing the future potential of a human being, then is it not different from saying that any missed opportunity for copulation would be equal to 'killing another Beethoven'. The act of resisting rape could then be considered as murder!

[End of paraphrase]

This is not to say that I am supporting that abortion is right, but this is not the right argument as to why abortion is wrong. The mistake is in conceiving when both parents are not ready to take up the responsibility of raising that child. When seen from this light, sometimes abortion might be a wiser choice if not aborting the child would cause even more suffering for both the parents as well as the expected child. Of course there is always the argument that an embryo is not considered a human yet and abortion is therefore technically not murdering, and there is also the argument that abortion causes less suffering than a slaughterhouse for animals, but I won't go into that (as I lack the expertise anyway).

At least now when you hear someone use Beethoven's story to pressure you to agree that abortion is murder, you have something new to enlighten them with.

Mosquitoes

2008-07-16T00:48:00.002+08:00

The other day I came across a quote:

"Mosquitoes don't bite; they stab"

This really got me thinking: Who ever came up with "mosquito bites"? They don't have anything to bite us with anyway...

The funny thing is, the quote came when i was reading about grammar, how it's a semicolon (;) instead of a comma (,).

The Actual Test...

2008-07-01T00:11:00.003+08:00

I arrived at Safety Driving Centre (Near Armada Hotel, Astaka Field and Asia Jaya LRT Station) around 7:55 am.

After settling my documents, I went to the waiting area for a short briefing.

The briefer gave us an overview of how the exams would proceed and general points to keep in mind during our test. After that, the testing begin.

Depending on when you submitted your form to the counter, candidates had to either do the slope, parking and 3-point turn examinations first or the road test first. After one hour of waiting, my name was called to wait for my slope, parking and 3-point turn test.

I waited to be signaled by the officer to enter one of the Kancils. A funny thing i did was that while adjusting my left side mirror (we had to stretch) i accidentally pressed on the accelerator, making a revving sound (lol). Fortunately, no points taken off for that.

I started towards the slope, accelerated, went up the slope, approached the yellow line, slowed down, BRAKE....

Just on the line!

After informing the officer my number, I did my balancing and went on without worries.

Parking next, this was when I realized how much my dashboard was vibrating, I was beginning to think if my Kancil was gonna break apart.

Slowly repeating what I had done more than ten times before in practice, I moved my car into the parking slot almost perfectly. As I began to reverse to prepare to leave the box,

PIANG!

the sound of a tiang falling down was heard.

I glanced back and to my relief and utter amusement, the car behind me had knocked down a tiang on its way out...

No problems with parking then, I proceeded to do my three-point-turn. Went in, turned over and over, reversed, turned some more, and went out...safely.

I passed my slope, parking and 3-point turn! hooray! Now I have to wait for my turn in the road test.

I went to sit among the crowd waiting to be tested, and waited...

1 hour went by...

Waited longer...

2 hours went by...

I was getting very restless by then, thinking how on earth can I drive properly after waiting for 2 hours...

Still my number (50) was not called.

3 hours later...

My instructor had by then gone by more than 3 times and asked me to be patient. So much for random number calling..

Finally at 2:00pm (I started waiting for the road test at 10:30am), my number was called. I proceeded to greet my instructor and began my road test.

Seat, mirrors, safety belt, gear, wiper and signals. After that I started making my way out of the center on to the busy road of Petaling Jaya.

As I stopped at the junction while waiting for cars to let me out (it was jammed). I glanced over to my left and to my horror found my score sheet with 3 crosses already! We need 16/20 to pass and before even reaching the road I have only 17 left.

I started getting worried but nevertheless drove as carefully as I could...

Until the instructor started telling me "cepat sikit..."

Not sure if it was because of cars behind me or was it because he was just plain bored, I went a little faster than normal. One thing I think i did well was adjusting as we came to a section where the road was being worked on, forcing all cars to go through only one lane (the right lane) near Bukit Bintang school. I guessed most drivers that memorized the route would be panicking when they saw this, but due to experience with other obstructions before in my practice drives, I did not worry much, after all, it's just signaling and cutting lanes. All my balancing turned out fine, as I did not cause any form of delay to the cars behind me (I have managed to train myself to balance and go within 5 seconds, essential to survive in city traffic lights).

As I finally reentered the driving center (I was too worried to even look at the score sheet again), I drove on and stopped where he indicated.

The instructor asked me to sign the results, and as I glanced through it:

Jumlah Markah

17/20

Keputusan : Lulus

I was overjoyed, knowing that I passed (without bribe)!

I went back int he office to fill up a form and was told to prepare a photo by the next day and collect the P license by Friday (4 days).

Overall, I was quite happy with my performance, though this experience has humbled my confidence in my driving skill. I realized (thanks to the harsh markings) that it really takes years to build a strong sense of estimation on how to really drive well.

I kind of thought that the tester was a bit restless too, and just crossed out certain points so I don't look like I get perfect, then probably judged my driving overall and decided if I passed.

Marks don't matter anymore since I passed, and as of now:

I CAN FINALLY DRIVE!

well.. at least not until Saturday XD

EDIT: Someone told me the RM890 I paid in total for all the fees and tests already had a packaged bribe... Oh wel, there goes the pride of passing without bribing, but i guess it's still cheaper then most others? And I didn't know about it till after I passed...

Approaching the Test...

2008-06-20T00:13:00.002+08:00

Driving test coming up, scheduled to be on 30th June (2 Mondays away).

Generally I hope I'll do fine, but as of now, my confidence stands at this:

Slope:
85% I'll hit the line (40% comfortable in the middle)
70% I'll balance well and go through (35% the whole process goes very smoothly)

Parking
95% I'll go through without any trouble at all.

Three Point Turn
99% I'll go through without any trouble at all.

On the road
I'm estimating 60% I'll pass at my current performance without any bias on the examiner's part, though I still have 4 hours more to go.

What happens to the remaining percentages where I don't pass?

For the first three parts, the only reason I could fail is that my engine dies due to poor clutch control, basically releasing it too fast, with balancing having a slightly higher chance of that happening. I have never knocked any posts, and I hope it stays that way for the test.

For the road test, traffic lights on the slopes are probably my main concern, followed by heavy traffic where it is difficult to change lanes. Rainy weather is bad too, no wipers for side mirrors, and a slippery shoe makes it much harder to control the clutch well.

That said, hope all goes well in my remaining practices and on that day, wish me luck!

(So I can drive myself to go yam cha with you guys in the future XD)

Of Lecturing, Tolerance and Fascism...

2008-06-19T23:54:00.006+08:00

I had an interesting Freshmen English II (EN102) lecture today.

(for those who do not know, Freshmen English II is an academic writing skills course, not a literary or creative writing course. The main focus is on writing research papers.)

The lecture was on how to take notes down on resources that we read, since evidence is always required to back up what you say in Academia, which i have come to believe means the academic world.

After an hour of lecturing, she proceeded to give us some exercises to practice what we've read, or rather she decided to have some fun with us.

After that, she gave us another set of articles in which we were to discuss.

It was titled "NOT LOVE, but TOLERANCE" by Gunter Grass.

It talked about how the world's political systems do not work, then goes on to say that tolerance is the key to living in a convivial way. He says love and hate come together, and asking us to love one another was too grand. He says that tolerance, despite being less dramatic and even boring, was more modest and sensible.

By the way, this article was from a philosophy class...

Then there were questions to be discussed after that. Some of them were:

a) It is more important to TOLERATE people than to love them.
b) It is more important to LOVE people than to tolerate them.

Which would you agree to?

Define the meaning of the following terms and phrases:

-Tolerance
-Love
-Hate
-Second-hand nationalism
-Convivial
-Fundamentalism
-Stalinism
-Clericalism
-Fascism
-Propaganda

Surprisingly enough, all these question become difficult to answer as a group because (as the lecturer explained) it turned out that most of us, despite having the same general idea, have very different definitions for what they actually mean. Thus we should be very careful when writing our research paper to define words that could be easily interpreted differently by other readers.

At this point one of my classmates asked aloud:

"What's Stalinism?"

Another student retorted:

"OMG, you don't know who he is?!"

He replied:

"Oh c'mon, my general knowledge is so small (he makes a small hole between his fingers"

Another helpful classmate mentioned:

"Stalin was a previous leader of the Soviet Union"

At this point it was obvious that Stalinism is a political regime from the Soviet Union. The class discussion went on and with most of us talking in circles about these words again, suddenly the same classmate blurted out again:

"Is Fascism a guy too?"

Incredible...

2008-06-13T19:41:00.003+08:00

Good job, but for anyone in there that is going for nationals, just a few words of advice.

1) This is not the usual "happy ending" songs that are common in Malaysia, the arrangement is more artistic. Thus, the color guards really need to bring the expression out, or else the audience will really fail to connect to the pieces.

2) Climaxes needs work, it's not strong enough to move the (mostly Malaysian) audience. All those crescendos and long notes need work in terms of precision and timing. Bigger sound would be good too...

3) Don't blame the video cam for bad sound quality, music-wise there is much room for improvement. Sound quality would really help in bringing out the music and show in general. Work on your tone color!

Great job in state-level and all the best in nationals!

Snappish replies...

2008-06-04T21:01:00.003+08:00

I thought this was just a small irrelevant matter but as the happenings are getting more frequent, I think I would need to address this somehow soon.

Ever messaged someone online asking innocently about a question and getting an impatient/frustrated/annoyed reply?

If this is the case, that person has either:

A) Been offended in the past by the asker and therefore retains a certain degree of vengeance
B) Not used English often and mistranslated words into the alleged manner of replies
C) Lost their patience due to a separate incident earlier that day that made him or her temporarily short tempered

but if it is from me, it is likely to be:

D) Trying to focus on doing something but getting distracted by an incoming message that asks about something that I believe is either not important or that the answer has already been told/could be found elsewhere.

Yes, lately I have realized that I tend to give snappy replies to people who ask me questions that I perceive as less important that what I'm trying to focus on and nothing more than a distraction, although it may be important to that person.

How do you avoid making me get annoyed by your question even though it's just a simple one that you might have just forgotten the answer?

All you need to do is just use a bit of manners and soften the impact of intrusion by adding in "Hey, are you busy?" before asking away to see if i'm busy trying to do something at the moment, or "Hey, sorry to disturb but could you spare me a few minutes?" before asking for any favors or questions.

Is it too hard to do? I'm sure not. I believe others of you may argue that my response is inappropriate in the sense that despite being busy, I should control my emotions and not be snappish in replying them. However, I feel too that in a certain sense, I should not answer everyone that readily if I have my own work to complete first.

Notice that my MSN status always shows BUSY? That's because most of the time I am doing something online. There are a few rare chances where you see my status as just online, those are the only rare moments where I am really free and do not mind chatting. How do you know? Just ask a simple "are you busy" and all would be well, don't start a first message with "how do we do today's homework?" right away, imagine how I would react if i were three quarters done with my research work at that moment?

Also, I would like to make it clear that I am not one to block my contacts or ignore them if I am doing work on my computer. Unless there are people who suggest I should just ignore these interruptions?

Have you guys encountered a similar experience?

Painting...

2008-05-28T00:36:00.002+08:00

Ever seen an elephant do a painting?

I'm rather surprised myself...

The Other Spiderman...

2008-05-11T20:49:00.001+08:00

Just in case you're wondering, this was at the 2002 MTV Movie Awards, which features movie parodies annually.

Meet My New Friend...

2008-05-05T20:34:00.003+08:00

Yup, my new friend here will keep me busy for quite a while...

and yeah, i can solve it, just that i looked online for help again XD

Malaysian facts...

2008-04-28T19:24:00.003+08:00

Copied from an e-mail I received recently:

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS:
Maggi Mee.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE:
Traffic Jam.

NATIONAL CONDOM:
None. Most Malaysians still feel embarrassed buying condoms.

So they rush into a 7-11, hurriedly grab the nearest pack,

any pack, pay and leave before the cashier can even blink an eye.

NATIONAL FRUIT FOR INDUCING MENSTRUATION:
Pineapple

NATIONAL APHRODISIAC DRINK:
Stout. Many swear by it.

But after a few pints they start

swearing at everything...

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN):
Food Poisoning.

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN):
Menstrual Pain

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY WOMEN WHEN REFUSING SEX:
Headache, kids not asleep, maid not asleep, mother-in-law around, early
appointment, period, haven't removed make-up, haven't had a shower, no water
supply, going to watch 'Desperate Housewives', depressed, no mood, etc...

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY MEN WHEN REFUSING SEX:
None. Malaysian men never refuse sex. (oh ya??)

NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES:
Panadol. The 'cure for all'. If it fails we have another secret weapon;
Tiger Balm.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS:

Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):
Happy Hours.

NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):
The sight of a police roadblock.

NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP:
Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.

NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME:
Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!

On second thought, why bother pronouncing stupid French brands like Peugeot, Renault or Citroen correctly. I think it sounds better,when the local mechanics say 'Pew Jeot'. When I was in school, Milo was always 'MeeLo', now that I'm sophisticated, I say 'My Lo'. So don't be embarassed saying 'Carry 4' when the ! Mat Sallehs shamelessly pronounce orang utan as 'rangootan'.

NATIONAL ROADSIDE DISTRACTION:
The Bra-less Tourist. See how heads turn and traffic slows down when a bra-less Mat Salleh backpacker goes 'bouncing' about on the streets.
haha...

I like all these facts but we are all so shy to admit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;-)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
P.S. It's strange that I'm posting more often when my finals are around XD

Misinterpretation

2008-04-27T23:20:00.003+08:00

More than one meaning can be derived from this poorly phrased sign...

Temptation...

2008-04-26T23:50:00.002+08:00

iPod with speakers!!!

Brain Teaser...

2008-04-23T23:39:00.003+08:00

Ignore the logic of the question though:

A bus contains 7 girls
Each girl has 7 bags
Each bag contains 7 big cats
Each big cat contains 7 small cats
All cats have 4 legs and girls have obviously 2 each.

How many legs are there on this bus?

Please post your answer at the tag board.

The answer...

2008-04-20T23:16:00.002+08:00

What should you do when you're feeling bored/emotional/restless/sad/indifferent/numb/confused/desperate ?

I'm sure some of you would get one of these feelings at one point or another.

So, the best answer I manage to come up with is : "Go and learn something new".

It takes your mind off of other things and also benefits you in the long run.

Well, what do you guys think? Any better ideas?

Reputation...

2008-04-18T23:52:00.002+08:00

Imagine there were two people, A and B.

A is a serious student, he never jokes around the other students in class and laughs along sparingly. He talks to other students mostly on academically related topics and always aims to perform as best he can in examinations.

B is a light hearted student that tries to have fun, joking with friends sarcastically and displaying his emotions openly, socializing with other students easily. He doesn't take examinations too seriously but nevertheless works hard to score well in them.

A friend of mine talked about this to me and said that if A were to meet B, A would probably think B is lying when he makes a sarcastic joke whereas B thinks A is always too serious and not as socially active as one should. On the other hand, I think reputation is a key factor to why A acts that way to let people trust him as an honest student.

Comparing these 2 students, which would you prefer to be? Why do you think so?

Education?

2008-04-13T22:24:00.001+08:00

For those of you who are (or were) in college, facing lecturers all the time, have a look at:

http://jimjam3.blogspot.com/2008/04/shallow-malaysians.html

If you have the time and patience, read through the comments as well...

Something for all of you to think about...

Puzzles...

2008-03-31T19:46:00.005+08:00

It turns out someone is really starting a puzzle club in HELP, it's already been approved. So, now it's just a matter of convincing a lecturer to be our staff adviser hehe...

So just to show my enthusiasm:

Tagged...zzz

2008-03-28T22:50:00.005+08:00

Tagged by Seou Yuen:

1. If you were given the chance to get the BEST ANSWER to any question, what would you ask?
Who is my most suitable other half?

2. If you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you? Why?
Tofuking, Herove Stormer and my sis', that way I can communicate with everyone because everyone else I know would post on their tag boards XD

3. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
My destiny....

4. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
To experience and understand everything that is worth my time...

5. Who would i marry?
a girl that has an open mind, and sincerely loves me for who I am...

6.Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
Why not? It's definitely possible and has happened...seeing is believing...

7. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
My values...

8.If you win $1 million, what would you do?
Spend it on everything I need now and put the rest in the bank to watch my money GROW...

9. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
In the old days, it would probably be alright but nowadays, TIMING is everything...

10. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
Refer to Q 5.

11. Which type of person do you hate the most?
Hate the most? people who take their lives for granted...

12. Do you like black or white?
White looks great on CERTAIN things and CERTAIN people, Black just looks great everywhere...

13. If you have faults, would you rather the ppl around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
Whatever it takes so that I get the message on where my faults are.

14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
Experience...

15. if u had a chance to rewind n replay.. wat would da moment b?? (aded by sy..)
The 12 minutes of the 2005 National Marching Band Competition in Stadium PISA when CHSB performed.

16. What's on your mind right now?
"I need more creative answers..."

17. If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
Having better EQ/EI, it's a weird thing, I sometimes feel like I'm too emotionless, sometimes on the other hand I feel like I'm overacting my emotions...

18. What's bothering you lately?
College work, fatigue (Physically), a bit of relationship stuff, a large pile of things I want to do and lots of confusion...

19. What is life about?
I know this sounds very immature and childish but I still think all of us are gonna learn a great secret at the end... otherwise, my rational side says life is about opportunity...

20. Tagging is troublesome. Agree?
Not very, but worth it to let people know what you have to say about these questions, good way to help people who can't express themselves to say more XD

People I tag:
(Look at my links section (Portal to other sanctuaries) and see if your name is there, if it is, do this tag and change any one question you probably don't want to answer and redo the questions, tag 8 or more people at the end of your tag.

The Cube...

2008-03-20T22:38:00.003+08:00

My sister says that cube I've been twisting every time I'm free is making me antisocial...

I think it's a good conversation starter...

There are more than 5 people in my college that can solve it themselves and one of them is planning to start a club for it...

What do you think?

P.S. I'm sure you guys know what cube I'm talking about right? You know, the one with 6 sides, 3X3X3 with 6 colors...

Jumping The Gun...

2008-03-19T21:07:00.005+08:00

Today my accounting lecturer was teaching about the different rates of depreciation, and their methods. He was telling us about the "Straight Line Method" when one of the classmates asked "of all names, why 'straight line method'?". The lecturer retorted "Wait wait... I haven't finish the story, it's like when you read a story book you wouldn't just flip a book to the last page and see if the hero dies, because if that's what you do why would you buy the book in the first place? No, you must follow the story, follow the build up, the suspense and climax, then you will find it more satisfying. By asking ahead you are jumping the gun, so just wait for a while for me to finish explaining."

He paused for a while, then said:

"By the way, do you know why they call it 'jumping the gun'? It's because last time when the Americans had war against the red Indians, you would see the troops lined up pointing their guns at the oncoming red Indians on horses and the commander would be saying "steady... steady... FIRE!" only giving the order to shoot when the troops have crossed the point of no return, unable to retreat. So if one of the troops released fire too early, the enemies would retreat while they still could. So that's why they use the term 'jumping the gun', which means acting too early"

The lesson continued and my exasperated friend asked another question regarding the advantages and disadvantages of the 'unit-of-activity method' of estimating depreciation and the lecturer said again "You're jumping the gun again, wait for me to finish explaining everything and I will tell you why companies choose these methods over others"

Frustrated, my friend said "So are you saying it is wrong to think ahead?"

And he responded with a smile "It's good to think ahead, just not aloud... I'm training you to think ahead with the right timing."

The entire class was left laughing and speechless ...

My Fruits of Labor...

2008-03-12T22:13:00.003+08:00

BM 3B
BC 5C
BI 1A (2A for GCE-'O' English)
MM 1A
AM 1A
BIO 2A
CHEM 1A
PHY 1A
SEJ 1A
MORAL 3B
EST 3B
ACC 1A

I know there are quite a few people upset with their results, I'm just here to remind you that this result does not reflect accurately what we are capable of, comparing your capabilities with your SPM results is in fact just like comparing your looks to one of your photos. Maybe some of us are not 'photogenic' in the examination way, nevertheless we should take our results in a positive way and work harder for our future. After all, there are bigger and more important exams than SPM...

Mocking...

2008-03-04T22:01:00.002+08:00

My microeconomics teacher has a slightly unclear pronunciation and thus sometimes her words may not be heard clearly.

She said today in class "So in the industry there's always lots of shifts,"

With the last word not spoken clearly, some guy from the back of the class decided to make it clearer to the rest of the class by retorting:

"shit"

How fast are your fingers?

2008-02-28T22:59:00.002+08:00

83 words

Speedtest

Bryan can do 107....

"Star Dazzling" Night...

2008-02-26T23:46:00.004+08:00

Last Saturday I went with Keng Onn to watch the Malaysian Philharmonic Orchestra(MPO)'s program entitled "The Planets". With ridiculously cheap prices of RM 15 (thanks to our student IDs), we were treated to (at least for me) one of the best live concert performances I have ever been to. The program goes as follows :

(No this isn't the actual poster they used, I stole this picture from Google and added the words myself.)

GIOACHINO ROSSINI
Overture: II signor Bruschino (5 mins)

NICCOLO PAGANINI
Violin Concerto NO.1 in D (Op.6) (34 mins)
Featuring violinist Feng Ning
-Allegro maestoso
-Adagio espressivo
-Rondo (Allegro spiritoso)

INTERVAL (20mins)

GUSTAV HOLST
The Planets (Op.32) (50 mins)
-Mars, the Bringer of War
-Venus, the Bringer of Peace
-Mercury, the Winged Messenger
-Jupiter, the Bringer of Jolity
-Saturn, the Bringer of Old Age
-Uranus, the Magician
-Neptune, the Mystic

The signor Bruschino was a pleasant opener to the concert. According to the program book (which cost me RM5), Rossini was born on the 29th of February, 1792 and thus on this week which is nearly where the once-in-every-four-years day arrives, it is only appropriate to be playing music written by himself. Any highlights? There was a part where you see the violinists tapping their bows in rhythm which provides a pleasant attractive effect to the piece (and yes their tempo is very steady, not forgetting there were about 12 of them tapping precisely on time).

Next up was the violin concerto which I did not know much of until reading about it. It turns out Niccolo Paganini was not only a famous violinist and composer at his time but also an extremely good player. He suffered from ligamentous laxity (loose ligaments) which granted him inhuman flexibility and skill over the violin thanks to his extremely flexible fingers of his left hand. This particular violin concerto is an extremely difficult one and should be listened to by all who enjoys the sound of a violin. Despite the enormously difficult technicalities of the piece, the guest soloist, Feng Ning, played the entire piece with guile and grace, making even the difficult parts seem effortless to him. If you haven't heard of this piece before, look it up on Youtube and at least listen to it once till the end.

After a standing ovation by some and ground shaking applause, a 20 minute interval followed to allow our awe-struck ears to take a break. After that, the real show began.

Holst is universally known for his arrangement of the Planets which included 7 movements in this suite excluding Earth and Pluto. Not that it was the first time any composer attempted to express the planets in the form of music, Holst's arrangement was a masterpiece. Earth-shatteringly original, this entire suite came out of this humble school teacher's imagination. If you have never heard of this piece of music in it's entirety before, you should give it a try. It is said without a doubt that music on space was never the same again after this composition, even tracks from Star Wars bear striking resemblance to certain parts of this suite (yes, Star Wars came AFTER the Planets). With newly implemented effects(which involves wordless female choruses being hummed eerily from an adjoining room) and the only ever glissando part written for the organ (though sadly I could not locate it), The Planets has become one of the most important classical pieces of our time. In case some of you are thinking about this, I guarantee that you would not fall asleep listening to this unless you are extremely tired. What further brings the life and beauty of this piece out is the exceptional quality of the MPO players as well as the excellent atmosphere of our wonderful Dewan Filharmonik Petronas which has wonderful acoustics. You can find recordings of the planets easily online or in CD stores but no recording can ever replace the experience you would have gone through listening to this live. Every one of the 7 movements was masterfully written, displaying 7 completely different emotions yet maintaining that eerie vast eternal depths of space feel. This music is very tense and should keep you listening carefully from beginning to end. I highly recommend anyone who doesn't mind listening to classical music to get your hands on this recording (Youtube would do fine though once again I stress how different listening to this live would be).

An interesting thing I noted was the wonderful job done by the MPO to promote classical music. Every concert is preceded by a pre-concert event that involves some form of 'appetizers' for what you are about to experience later in the evening. The interesting and informative details in the program really helps one to understand what is to be focused on while listening in the hall during the concert. For RM15 (as long as you can prove you are a student) that includes the best seats if you book them early enough, all of you should take advantage of this opportunity and experience music at it's finest. Just drop by the box office at KLCC and take a look at the upcoming programs, every show is definitely worth your money.

Thoughts...

2008-02-20T21:29:00.002+08:00

Is thinking too much a sin?

Challenge

2008-02-20T20:50:00.001+08:00

Think Mario is too easy? Try playing the following link:

http://www.geocities.jp/z_gundam_tanosii/home/applet/Main.html

Don't take advantage of the things you learned in Mario, you have been warned.

Afraid?

2008-02-19T22:24:00.001+08:00

Recognize fear for what it really is :

False
Evidence
Appearing
Real

It's Official...

2008-02-16T00:20:00.000+08:00

I am now 216 months old...work it out yourself XD

Decrypted

2008-02-10T01:06:00.000+08:00

After spending more than 20 hours twisting that 6-sided, 3X3 cube and about 2 hours staring at this:

http://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/How_to_solve_the_Rubik%27s_Cube

Rubik's Cube has FINALLY been SOLVED by your truly XD

P.S. Many thanks to Bryan for the hints earlier on.

Cloverfield

2008-02-06T02:21:00.000+08:00

February 5, 2008 - I went for dinner with some friends at Sunway Pyramid (Carls Jr.) and after playing Billiards for a while, went to watch 'Cloverfield' at the cinemas.

For my review, which will contain no spoilers, it was an excellent movie overall. First thing all of you should know before watching this is that the filming method of this movie is that of a hand-held camera, which may cause nausea for some people due to the shakiness. To fully enjoy this movie, you need to put aside pure logic and reasoning and just enjoy the ride. It's a horror movie that is refreshingly creepy at some points but not to the extreme of those hard core horror movies of the past. What I should say is that the really frightening part of it is how realistic the scenario is presented to the audience. For all those who wanted to know more background on the story (because not everything is explained in the movie, so don't get you're hopes up too high), I have good news - there is a good chance there will be a sequel. All in all, it is in fact the American version of 'Godzilla' plus more realism in it. Go watch it, but not on a full stomach XD

Tagged...zzz

2008-02-04T23:35:00.000+08:00

i got tagged by : Bryan Chong

Your 5 impressions of him/her:
1) Determined
2) Approachable
3) Interesting (yea that's an impression)
4) Very fast learner
5) *Insert random description that exemplifies his achievments*

Most memorable things he/she has done for u:
Not that there isn't anything memorable but rather that all of them are. At the moment, frisbee, pp, o2jam, piano (scores), random chunk of files through windows live messenger, load of videos and blogs?

The most memorable words he/she said to u:
"Not bad"? sry can't think of any at the moment

If he/she becomes ur lover, u will:
(No comments) probably vomiting everyday XD

If he/she becomes ur enemy, the reason will be:
The only thing that remotely seems possible would be screaming "Damn you suck" at me x times a day where x > 1...

Pass the quiz to 10 ppl that u wish to know how they feel about u:
1) Keng Onn
2) Desmond Ling
3) Li May
4) Li Ying
5) Gabriel Lim
6) Patricia
7) Hollie
8) Seou Yuen
9) Xiao Von
10) Zi Yang

Who is no.7 having a relationship with?
Er... not that I know of...

Who is no.9 having a relationship with?
No idea...

If no.9 and no.1 are together, will it be a good thing?
Maybe... maybe...

What about no.1 and no.5?
Homos...

What is no.3 studying?
Taylor's University College.

When was the last time u chatted with no.6?
Few weeks ago i think...

Does no.4 work?
Still studying?

Does no.8 have any cousin(s) in his/her skool?
Don't think so...

Will u woo no.8?
No

How about no.5?
Not in this lifetime I think

Does no.2 have any siblings?
3 brothers and a sister, yet he was the youngest XD

How did u get to know about no.3?
In class during Form 4.

No. 4?
Same.

Where does no.1 live at?
Old Town bus stop there, 57/ sumthing D , No. 18

How did u get to know no.2?
CHS Band

Is no.5 the sexiest person in the world?
I'm 100% sure he thinks he is. But I guess I wouldn't disagree (cuz he can read this ahaha)

Amplification...

2008-02-04T23:22:00.000+08:00

Never EVER go to a shopping mall when you're feeling 'EMO'...

Accumulation...

2008-02-03T23:23:00.000+08:00

I know it's probably very common to at some point in life feel so frustrated and down that you really wish you can just get rid of that icky feeling like your heart's being clutched by some unknown unfathomable disgusting black massive blob stuff that you probably can't even imagine right now... Yet I am so sure 99% of you out there have felt this before (and probably at least gave a better explanation than this feeble attempt). As usual I thought I was overreacting again, then as I began to rethink about the possible reasons, I found not one, or two, but five reasons. By themselves, all these reasons seem kind of ridiculous, but all five of them in the span of 8 hours, although it may not seem much, is bad enough to make me write this. So the question is, what CAN one do in these kinds of situations?

Oh, and I went for my 5 hour driving theory class and I'm proud to say "It's not boring!". So either you had a boring speaker, listened to those stuff already, you're retaking the class, you have no interest in these kind of stuff, or you had it in Malay (Yes I had the class in English... ENGLISH).

Owned by maths lecturer...

2008-01-29T21:56:00.000+08:00

Yea, sorry about not updating, but I guess you guys wouldn't need to know everything that's happening anyway, I'll just post any highlights, like this one.

So today during Calculus class, our ADP Calculus lecturer, Ms Rani was teaching us about differentiation. It's pretty much the same as the one I learned back in Form 4, so she was teaching us the torturous method of First Principle to find derivatives of functions. You know, the dy/dx thing...

So after doing a bunch of exercises on that, she told us:

"Now I am going to teach you another method to find the derivatives, and it's a much faster and more direct way, just ONE step to solve it."

So at this point I was a bit doubtful about the 'one step' thing because it really had a few parts even though it really was much faster. So she proceeded to ask us to try out the 18 example questions we had in our notes :

So she sat down on her table and watched us do it by ourselves for about twenty minutes. I barely finished and was just starting to look around to look at the others when she stood up and said:

"Ok, now for the answers..."

And she started looking at the questions (it was shown on the projector screen) and with a few finger twists in mid air, started mentally solving them and writing down the answers. (It was obvious she did not prepare answers)

The really scary part was from questions 13-18 where she actually managed to get the answers mentally - no pen or paper used... in about 15 seconds for each of them (those of you who just learned derivatives up till SPM level will find them a bit tedious I'm sure). At this point the guy sitting behind me was already saying our lecturer was mad because it took us 20 minutes to do them on paper and for her, about 5 minutes... mentally.

I guess she really meant it when she said "just ONE step"...

Ultimate

2008-01-22T17:39:00.000+08:00

HELP will be revitalizing it's Ultimate Team starting this semester. That's right, I've joined the team and will from now on be an enthusiastic ultimate player, until I get bored or injured that is. Anyone of you who doesn't know what Ultimate is, look here.

Anyone who wants to see what ultimate is all about, watch this.

Don't bother about the last part XD

Week 1 Update...

2008-01-18T23:49:00.000+08:00

Yeah, I've just survived my first week of college at Help University College American Degree Program. Now, the reason I'll be (hopefully) posting weekly updates is because basically all my classes have this "Course Outline" which details the contents of each weeks lessons and I'll be going through 14 weeks of class, thats before a week of study break and final exams (which all stand for 50% or less of the total marks). So anyway, I'm taking a total of 5 subjects this term, but not all are probably gonna accredited by some universities at the US. The two subjects that probably won't get transfered are "Freshmen English I", which is a writing class that teaches me how to write in a proper style and learn to cite and so on. The other one is "Computers And Their Applications", which deals with basic softwares like Word, Excel and Powerpoint, the latter being the only reason I have not dropped this subject. Aside from that, it may be easier to score well in that subject anyway. So the remaining three subjects are "Calculus I" (Which looks like a continuation of Add Maths that I learned in Form 4 and Form 5), "Accounting I" (which is more detailed, in American English and more or less still the same actually), and "Microeconomics "(which deals with economy on a smaller scale, such as referring to a company, firm or individual and the effects, decisions and interactions. "Macroeconomics" on the other hand deals with the bigger picture, but I won't be learning that this semester). So that's five subjects in total but could be worth only 11 credit hours (Calculus 5, Accounting 3 and Microeconomics 3, the other two may not transfer). Since I should attain 30 within every year, that means I can't relax by taking less subjects for the year.

Alright, now less blabbing and more about the classes. The timetable is a bit weird as the classes are set but you choose which subjects you take. This may result in ridiculous hours of classes, but on the other hand a few breaks in between. Like for Monday, Wednesday and Friday, I have classes in the morning only. As for Tuesday, morning classes, a 4 hour break stretching from noon to 4, and another class from 4 to 6, which happens to be calculus. Thursday is my more 'hectic' day with 4 different classes spanning from 8 in the morning all the way until 5 in the afternoon. Half an hour breaks between the classes means I will have a short lunch every Thursday. Wednesday and Friday afternoons from 12 to 2 are special hours with no classes at all, these are the times to go for club meetings and so on.

My "Calculus I" class has three sessions a week. My lecturer is Ms Rani, who is an Indian I believe but definitely competent enough to teach me calculus. She's on the pathway to be an actuary herself I think. Her classes can be a bit weary and boring because you would be purely listening and doing maths, and only maths.

My "Freshmen English I" lecturer is Ms Elaine, who used to be an author for some "Sasbadi" reference books in English SPM (and mentioned how sorry was for contributing to our 'sad' literature section in the English Exam). She has quite a workload for us every week, one of which is known as the "Working File" which stands for 20% of the final marks. From week 3 to week 12 (a span of 10 weeks), we have to do a weekly update of:

1) A summary of the week's lessons (200 words max)
2) An Application essay to apply the new skills and techniques we learned in the week (700 words minimum)
3) A Reaction Essay, where we apply our creative juices and write a reaction to a weekly topic to be discussed that is based on an article (which comes from this book we all had to buy that is a compilation of many many articles and they are seriously LONG, about 2000 words each). The reaction writing can be in the form of poems, songs, short stories, or just a plain essay on your opinion on the topic. (500 words approx.)

So that's probably the most tedious part of the work, alongside these 30 items to be written are a group project that is on social work in Malaysia, and an group presentation on the very same topic. Anyone still thinks English is easy?

My Accounting class is taught by Mr. Gavin Chong. He's actually a British accounting graduate, but teaches us the American style and talks about a lot of background information that is relevant. His use of general knowledge helps makes the lessons more interesting in a way. One good thing about accounting at this stage is that we finally use $ instead of RM.

My Computer Class is conducted by Ms Ling, and we have a lecture and a lab session once a week. The lab session is where we go into a room full of computers (called a Learning Space) and do some practical work, on the fun side, we all have internet access throughout the class (yeah, we can check our mails); on the less interesting side, the stuff we do can sometimes get a bit annoying, and my lab session is at the end of the 'four classes in a row' schedule on Thursday, meaning I would be dead tired by then. An interesting note is that once we get our Learning Space IDs (probably by next Monday), we can log using our accounts and there would be a special 'space' on the computer that is only accessible by us, meaning whichever Learning Space or computer we use we can still access them.

My Microeconomics lecturer would be Ms Melinda Chung. During the first class I had a bad impression that this would be a boring subject, but on the second class, I realized it isn't as bad as I thought. While teaching the principles and stuff in our Microeconomics syllabus, she relates to a lot of things in real life that are very relevant and uses Powerpoint to show us slides of notes. What is even better is that she also gives us the very slides she used in those presentations online so that we can refer and avoid the 'i didn't manage to write that down' problem.

One interesting feature in college is that we can get notes online at a website where all the lecturers can post their notes that they want us to print online (which saves all the paper cost and make us value the notes we print ourselves) thought it really can be helpful to have a copy of whatever they are teaching, it becomes a hassle that we have to check regularly if the new notes are out so that we can print them.

So I signed up for 2 clubs at the moment. The first is their Ultimate Frisbee Club (yes Bryan I know you're jumping from reading this), in fact I'm not too sure why I joined. It could be due to a few friends of mine joining at that time, or maybe it could be the staff adviser, Mr Caroll Moreton, who happens to be our ADP Head of Department. He's bald, speaks exactly like an American, is the head for mass communications (so I don't need to describe what an interesting speaker he is) and quite enthusiastic about Frisbee (he said he used to dive but stopped after undergoing 2 shoulder surgeries). Or maybe I just wanted to try a new sport, after all I've probably been affected by Bryan's enthusiasm at some point. This means I'm booked every Saturday from morning 9 to 11 am as i will be at the KBU field practicing Frisbee.

The other club I joined is the Peer Support Group (PSG). It's actually a club that encompasses all the activities and benefits that we would get from joining extra curricular activities. It's mainly joined by students in the B.Psych (Bachelor of Psychology) department or ADP students that major in Psychology. The main goal is to empower ourself as individuals and more importantly, learn how to help people. Alongside those things, they also have camps and lots of activities that improve our speaking skills, organizing skills, leadership and maybe even social skills. They have General Meetings (GMs) every now and then but mostly on Wednesday or Friday noon.

So, I'll keep you guys updated weekly (unless I have too much work).

Which is worse?

2008-01-16T21:27:00.000+08:00

A) No one to have feelings for...

B) Too many people to have feelings for...

P.S. - I'm very sure which one Jeffrey's facing at the moment XD

...and yeah, I'm starting to think i have some "issues"...

Indirect...

2008-01-15T04:36:00.000+08:00

When someone says to you,

"I really enjoy spending time with you",
"I feel so much happier when I'm with you",
"I wouldn't mind talking to you for hours without stopping",
"To me, you are one of the greatest person I have ever met",
"Your weaknesses only make you more human to me",
"There's just that warm feeling I feel inside whenever I see you smile",

What difference is it from just saying "I ~~love~~ think I'm starting to really like you" ?

ADP Orientation in HELP

2008-01-09T18:24:00.000+08:00

Today, 9th of January 2008 was my orientation for the American Degree Program (ADP) in HELP University College, it was quite a new experience. First of all, I never realized HELP was so "long". The walkway from the main entrance to the end of the campus block was nearly half a km. I did not expect to see so many lecture halls and seminar rooms, they weren't joking when they said HELP had around 9000 students. About 20% of them are from foreign countries, like in the ADP program alone there were 3 students from France, 2 from Zambia, 1 from Bangladesh, 1 from Kenya, and also one from Pakistan. Not all of them were fresh from SPM exams, some finished their A-Levels, some, their STPMs, a few came from private schools where they did their GCE O-Levels. So with many new soon to be friends, I managed to befriend one guy whose name is Jeffrey Siow (No, not the one from CHS people, he came from Taman Sea). Turns out these 2 "Jeffrey Siow"s were classmates in primary school, weird huh, for me to meet one then meet the other, and of all places in ADP HELP.

So the orientation started with a series of briefings where we were told lots of stuff that we needed to know. Our timetable seems rather flexible, like for a tutorial session there may be 2 to 3 time slots of choice so you can avoid clashes with other subjects or plan to go to those classes with other friends. The unique thing about the American Degree Program is that in the process you need to accumulate up to roughly 120 credit hours. (One credit hour would be about one hour of class for that subject a week). Most subjects are 3 credit hours while some sciences and others would be 4 or maybe 5. So spreading the 120 credit hours over 4 years (since this is a 2+2 program), we would need to do 30 credit hours a year, which is roughly 10 subjects. There are 3 semesters a year in HELP ADP, 14 weeks, 8 weeks and 14 weeks. It is recommended to do 4, 2 and 4 subjects but we may do more if we wish to speed up and possibly save one semester of time. There's no limit to the number of subjects we may take at each semester, as long as we have the fulfilled pre-requisites and the classes do not clash. (Of course it also depends if the class is offered for that particular semester). Another thing is the 35-40 subjects we need to take to graduate are not all related to the major that you are taking. For example, if I were to be majoring in Actuarial Science (which I probably will be), maybe about 20-25 subjects are related to Actuarial Science. The other 15 subjects or so have to be on Liberal education (sort of like general education) and other electives. This is so that the American education will build up an all rounder who has at least some form of knowledge for each 'category' of education. So I will have to take a few classes that may involve science, humanities, communication, creative arts and the sort. But, the good thing is we have a choice to do which subject for those categories. Thus, when we finally get accepted to a certain university in the states, we'll just see what subjects combinations need to be fulfilled by that university and finish whatever we have left over from the first 2 years. Therefore, we can choose almost any subject we wish at the moment as long as it fulfills the requirements at the end.

One annoying thing about ADP in Malaysia is the need to take LAN subjects, namely Malaysian Studies and Moral Studies (Islamic for Malaysian Muslims). International students are not required to but may take these classes if they wish. It costs RM300 to take any one of these subjects and we must pass both only once, before we transfer to the universities abroad. So that's 42 hours more of classes in a semester, and if anyone is unlucky enough not to get a credit (Grade of C6 or above) in our SPMs, we will need to take another subject called Bahasa Kebangsaan A. (Prays for C6 or above in SPM XD)

So thats about it for my first day at ADP, I'll update any interesting stuff that goes on in my college. Oh and in case any of you were wondering, there isn't a single person I know before this in the ADP Program. Time to make new friends then. XD

Writing Music...

2008-01-03T18:36:00.000+08:00

Be it arranging or composing, I've just realized that unlike what most of you probably think, it's harder to write music in silence than when you are in a conversation. So to speak, I'm beginning to feel drained when trying to arrange something each time I meet a problem, but when there's someone in the background messaging me talking about everyday stuff, I seem to get a new everlasting source of strength to continue my writing... maybe what's stopping is just...boredom...

2008 Resolution...

2008-01-02T00:19:00.000+08:00

Learn to drive...
Become fitter...
Do really really really well in college...
Keep in touch with all my dear friends...
Learn to save more money...
Eat well...
Start using and following a planner...

etc...

Tagged...zzz

2007-12-25T23:08:00.000+08:00

LIST OF TOP 5 PRESENTS YOU WISH FOR:
1. Friends and family to last forever.
2. Success? And a memorable journey through my education years.
3. Good job that's fun and worth my time.
4. No more accidents...
5. Shh, I can't tell you this...

THE PERSON WHO TAGGED YOU IS:

Li Ying

YOUR 5 IMPRESSION ABOUT HIM/HER:
1. Friendly
2. Usually possessing a contagious aura of (no, not blurness) laughter.
3. Erm, called me a hypocrite? XD
4. Rather sensitive but shows empathy.
5. Loves Lee Hom?

THE MOST MEMORABLE THING HE/SHE HAS DONE FOR YOU:
I'm sorry... but you called me a hypocrite! It really is the most memorable thing...YET.

THE MOST MEMORABLE WORDS HE/SHE EVER SAID:
"Emperor"

IF HE/SHE BECOMES YOUR LOVER, YOU WILL:
Probably grateful...

IF HE/SHE BECOMES YOUR ENEMY, YOU WILL:
Wake up to find I just had the weirdest nightmare...

IF HE/SHE BECOMES YOU ENEMY, THE REASON WILL BE:
She killed my ______, my _______ and my _______!!!!!!

PASS THIS TO 10 PEOPLE YOU WISH TO KNOW HOW THEY THINK ABOUT YOU:

All those who have NOT YET done this tag. I wanna know what you think of me XD

Merry Christmas 2007 XD

2007-12-25T12:27:00.000+08:00

Merry Christmas to all. Exodus here wishing everyone a wonderful and memorable day as well as for the next 364 non-Christmas days. For all of my wonderful friends, good luck in your education and take care. For my family (if any of you are reading this) thanks for everything.

Have a jolly holiday XD

Trauma...

2007-12-24T02:59:00.000+08:00

When was the last time you really panicked for your life? Just back from a trip to Pangkor Island with my band mates. Amidst all the fun, laughter and wonderful experience, I had a nearly drowning experience. It was during "Island Hopping", an event where we visit some islands around. We reached this beach to play around awhile and while some of them were enjoying the Banana Boat ride, I was reckless enough to try swimming towards the boat which was anchored a short distance off the beach. It was actually so deep that before even reaching one third of the distance I couldn't stand on the bottom of the sea. So as I reached about two thirds on the way to the boat with another friend, I felt exhausted and started getting really worried I wouldn't be able to get back to shore. Since I never really learned the proper technique to back float without using having to paddle, I started swimming back and started panicking when I was running short of breath. Every time I tried to just lie on my back and rest ( my mouth would just be above water) I got splashed by an on coming wave, submerging me in water yet again. I began to panic and swim as hard as I can back as I wasn't sure whether my friend would notice if I drowned. As I nearly ran out of energy... my feet touched the ground. I crawled on to the beach in shock and just laid there for a long time.

For those of you who never tried this before, it isn't fun when you can't touch the ground, you're running out of breath and far from land. Salt water and the fact that you can't really hear anything doesn't help either. As I sat quietly on the jet boat back to the main shore we came from, I started thinking what would have happened if I didn't manage to get back to shore. It was probably that I was still breathing very heavily and the taste of salt water still in my throat as well as that sickening feeling of gasping for air. Perhaps this would teach me a lesson never to go out in to the sea without a life jacket next time.

It's probably one of the worst experiences I ever had... and what makes this only worse is the sinking feeling that no one was there to comfort me. Those of you who have someone always by your side, please appreciate it...

Tagged...zzz

2007-12-18T15:46:00.000+08:00

1) Do this tag and answer all the questions in your own blog.
2) Delete question 20 and add one of your own questions instead.
3) Tag 8 other people.

Questions

1) What was your dream when you were a kid?
Dream? Wasn't really ambitious then, always thought I would wanna be a doctor because it sounded noble and would earn loads of $$ but now... nope, not gonna even touch medicine XD

2) What was the happiest moment in your whole life?
To be really honest, winning the Malaysian National Level Marching Band Competition with my fellow band mates back in 2005 in Stadium PISA, Penang. I mean, seriously, BEST IN MALAYSIA!

3) What do you wish to have right now?
A safe and memorable journey through college, university, work, and my love life...

4) When was the last time you horse laughed?
Probably Langkawi, but not too sure..

5) What did you realize recently?
That I'm looking more forward to college than learning to drive. Weird huh?

6) Which bad habit in you is the most unacceptable?
Overreacting, or not paying attention.

7) When you are unhappy, what will you do?
Either find someone to talk to about it, find books to read, or just do something else...

8) What are you afraid of losing?
Family, friends, all my possessions, my home and my dogs.

9) Within 5 years, which target is the most realistic?
Just got my degree and start working, earning some $$ and hopefully finding more people to love...

10) When you meet someone you like, will you hide or profess your feelings?
Hide till that person earns my trust.

11) List out 3 kinds of people you cannot stand.
People who smoke/do drugs/*insert random negative thing* and try to influence me, people who are insensitive and those who are not open minded.

12) Define loneliness.
When you can't find a single person to share all the great and tough things you're going through...gosh that really is dreadful...

13) Are you satisfied with your life now?
So far, yes, though not completely.

14) When was the most recent time you felt touched?
Reading 'Pandora' by Jilly Cooper (Refer to earlier post)

15) Where is the most beautiful place that you have visited?
Probably London...

16) A song that has been playing in your mind recently.
I listen to more than 15 songs a day, you expect less than that number to be playing back in my mind?

17) If you could have a wish come true, what would it be?
To have a "save point" so that when I reach the end of my life I can load and go through my life again XD

18) Do you have anything to be worried or scared about lately?
Slacking in college, or maybe some diseases.

19) If the world is going to end, what will you do?
I'll know when the time comes, but I'm sure it's gonna be something worth my last moments.

20) What value do you put as the most important one in your life above everything else?
The willingness to change and adapt oneself to improve your bad characteristics and become a better complete person in life.

I tag:
Everyone in my "Portal to Other Sanctuaries" section.

Connected...

2007-12-18T03:53:00.000+08:00

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, Marry Poppins, famous, Bryan, Tau Foo, food, lunch, KFC, commercialism, big words, Pn Sim, Catholic High School, nostalgia, geeks, pretty girls, fascinating, quantum physics, time, arcade, Pong, frisbee, books, German Shepherd, Rocky, Pocky, comfort food, organic, Pn Lee Li Lian, 600Kg, Brenda, deceitful, Snape.

I dare anyone who has not gone to the 5S1 (supposedly) Langkawi trip to make sense of this...

Have fun XD